I knew going into training for a half ironman I would be facing challenges. My body still recovering from a hip stress fracture, the reason this crazy adventure started, would be the biggest challenge itself right? Nah. Not at all. I am going to go back to grade school now and draw my bubble with stems off of it to create my intro, 3 body paragraphs, and conclusion here. Haha just kidding! Funny however being a triathlete that I am going to group this into the 3 (get it TRI) areas that have really just been trying during this adventure. Was that an accurate thesis statement? :)
So when I started I was mainly worried about my hip acting up. At the beginning of the year when I was training for the marathon and got to the 18-20 mile runs I felt the pain come back so I backed off and did the half marathon instead, and the pain went away. Woohoo! Smart girl! Well my half IM training was going smoothly and without silly pain until I decided to go out and conquer Mountain Goat hills with my bike and let's just say the hip and hamstring did not agree that Mountain Goat was a fun, good idea like I thought. When training for a half IM and you are 4 weeks out you can't really just back off and I am sure not going to skip it. I am already one wetsuit down and I am not going to add a paid half IM and 6 months of training to it. But I was once again a good girl and went and saw my PT and she told me to roll and stretch. I have been like a freaking superstar. And the pain is....yah, nope it is still there. It is less and I am working through it but it is still there. I can't really expect it to go away putting 80 miles on the bike and 15 on my feet in two days though. I will be a good girl and take some time off....starting July 20th :) That is the first challenge, on to stem number 2.
Money. I am broke. I do not mean I am missing out on area races because I decided to do a big race broke, I mean I am flat broke. Yes I took a slight pay cut to be in a happier job position, but holy crap being a triathlete is expensive. Notice how running is more popular, it isn't because it is easier, it is because it is cheaper!! Ok I am kidding here, I respect all of my triathlete friends MORE than anyone can EVER know. I respect their wallets too. I know a guy that does 3, IM a year. That is $750! FOR ONE OF THEM...and I mean just race entry. That doesn't include travel, board, food, and all the upkeep on race equipment. I remember my friend Mike and me adding up our races a few years back and we had spent like $700 on race fees and were all proud and could not believe how much we had spent. I spent that on equipment. I have done 4 races this year and spent over $700. WTF!!! So you can only imagine the B***H that I became when my wetsuit was stolen 2 days after I bought it. You have got to be F ing kidding me. I will tell you what, the person who came up with IM is probably one rich son of a genius. So yah I am broke. Who wants to buy me a beer tonight? Ok, the last stem, the one I did not expect, the one that has been the most trying...
Relationships. Time. I remember one friend telling me that doing an IM is the most selfish thing you can ever do to a spouse. Another told me she spent 20 hours a week training for her IM. 20 freaking hours. Yes folks, you train like it is a part time job because an IM is not an easy task and if you do not train you will not finish. I am afraid I won't finish the Half IM and I have trained well. Very well, I am very proud of myself. It is very straining to your relationships. This weekend I trained for 5 hours on Saturday and 3 hours Sunday. I was a tired mess. Cory wants me to hang out with him, go on bike rides, stay up and watch movies. It is not his fault I am tired but week after week of going through this gets to him. I do not want to clean or do extra stuff because I have already done so much. I do not feel like going out for drinks with friends or going over to my moms for dinner. I mean, I have fun once I get my butt up and go out but it is trying to even put on makeup and do my hair sometimes. I definitely have used training as an excuse and some friends and family have been hurt by it, mostly Cory, because he gets a front row viewing of it all. He sees when I am tired, hears when I am hurt, helps me because I am broke, and still cheers me along the way. I definitely have him, my parents, and friends to thank once this is all said and done! For helping me and putting up with my grouchy ass! :)
Ok this isn't another stem, I just wanted to separate it because it is the most trying of all the tri's... my relationship with myself. I do not know how many times in the past 3 months I have told myself I CAN NOT do this. It is a constant battle in my head. I am so pessimistic about this race, For each Olympic we have done in preparation I have had a constant battle in my head the week before. I have been so down in the dumps and hard on myself. I think this has taken the toughest toll on my relationship with myself. I know that half of the bike and probably most of the run will be accomplished with my brain. I need to be able to be positive, not compare myself with others, and do the best I can. Sadly this is also the hardest part for me. I have voiced my worries and had several friends who are IM say that I am fine, and I will surprise myself, and this and that. I remember when my friend was doing his first half marathon and he was freaking out and I kept thinking, "it is only 13 miles dude." Yah I was an ass. He had never done it, of course he was nervous and worried. Sometimes I want to say, "HEY IM, this is my first too!" I am sure a half is easy to an IM but it is daunting to me. I just need to remember that it is my race, not my friends, not the person next to me in the swim/bike/run. I hope to come back with an awesome The Terrific Tales of the Triathlete afterwards haha. I just need to calm down and race my race. Regardless I have learned a lot about myself through the training, mostly that I am a heck of a lot stronger than I thought I was and that I can go a lot longer and harder than I thought I could. I just need those happy thoughts for my race.
Happy thoughts! :) (Yes that is my closing paragraph) That says enough!
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
Fifty Shades of Caitlyn Jenner
So I seemed to have lit a small fire with my post. I try to stay away from political, religious, etc topics so I avoid this, but once in awhile I feel an itch and post something other than my latest workout or serial killer fantasy. Oops.
I think I was misunderstood. I often am. I talk a lot, most of the time in circles not making sense, and a lot of the time saying something that someone will not exactly agree with! Hey I tell how I feel, what I think. This is not always the best thing but you can rest assured that I am honest! So there is that.
As for my post today, and if you did not see it it was this:
"Just heard that Caitlyn Jenner (Bruce) got more twitter followers in 4 hours than President Obama. This is what the world has come to.... :("
I meant in no way any disrespect for Caitlyn/Bruce lifestyle/choices/etc. I think anyone that steps out and lives their life the way they want to with no regrets and no worries about others judging, that is remarkable and something to be proud of. (I know I for one worry way to much about what people think of me.... I am writing this post because I am worried I upset people!) I have witnessed and stood by many friends that have kept secrets because of what they would do to their life if they let them out. I think you should live the life you want to, how you want to. As long as you are not hurting someone else in the process, it is your life. (This could be explained a lot better, I know, I need an editor to help me put my thoughts into words..... Letitia, I NEED YOU -insert business card!)
I guess what I meant is, I know a lot of people who have went through life changing obstacles. I know several that could be on magazine covers for what they have accomplished, what they have survived, what they have achieved....but they never will be. No one will care, because they aren't famous and it is not breaking news.
I listen to the radio on the way to the Y to swim and every morning I have to flip through stations to find songs because it is either HOLLYWOOD DIRT/CELEBRITY TRIVIA/CELEBRITY NEWS. I get to work and on breaks go to read the news and have to scan through 50 different headlines of whatever crap whatever celebrity is doing/has done/or is going to do. I'll be the first to say I like actors, I mean I have a top 5 list we joke about. I like the part they play in a show. When it comes to their real life, WHO CARES?? I do not know them from the guy that just drove by in his car. Just because I like Paul Spector on The Fall doesn't mean I want to know what Jamie Dornan does on Friday evening at 5pm. Just because I named my bike Dexter doesn't mean I care who Michael Hall is dating! Yes, I agree, the news surrounding Jenner, as my friend Valeria put it, "says a lot about the society we live in...." I agree, this story is different. It also has been done many times before by people who do not have the status and money and popularity that the Kardashian's and Jenner's have. Why can't those stories be told? Aren't they just as telling of our society as Jenner's?
I counted today. I read that the new Fifty Shades of Grey book is being released in at least 7 different headlines. Jenner was in even more. If you go to Yahoo's News page, the first page is all celebrity news. You actually have to search for real news. I like a good story now and then, and yes, I read this one on Jenner, I even read the one on Fifty, but come on, it is a struggle to find non celebrity news online. Now I do read the newspaper every day and go online to the News Gazette, so there is ways to avoid it, but still.
We were at a baby shower and one of the games was to name the celebrity baby name. It was fun, don't get me wrong! Some of the names celebs give their kids are just dreadful!! I think I overheard the answer for one and got that one right, maybe even guessed another. Some people got almost all right. That was baffling to me. I guess it isn't my thing, like watching serial killer shows isn't most people's thing. I guess there just comes a point when I get sick of hearing about Kim K's butt, Lindsay Lohan is in jail again, and Ben and Jen are breaking up..... It just isn't important. So yes, it surprised me today when the top 2 stories were Caitlyn and Fifty. I am sorry for offending anyone, like I said, what Caitlyn/Bruce is doing for herself is great and inspiring to anyone that is hiding their true self. I just feel that we forget that when a celeb does something like that it is remarkable, when a normal average person does it, it is what it is.....
I think I was misunderstood. I often am. I talk a lot, most of the time in circles not making sense, and a lot of the time saying something that someone will not exactly agree with! Hey I tell how I feel, what I think. This is not always the best thing but you can rest assured that I am honest! So there is that.
As for my post today, and if you did not see it it was this:
"Just heard that Caitlyn Jenner (Bruce) got more twitter followers in 4 hours than President Obama. This is what the world has come to.... :("
I meant in no way any disrespect for Caitlyn/Bruce lifestyle/choices/etc. I think anyone that steps out and lives their life the way they want to with no regrets and no worries about others judging, that is remarkable and something to be proud of. (I know I for one worry way to much about what people think of me.... I am writing this post because I am worried I upset people!) I have witnessed and stood by many friends that have kept secrets because of what they would do to their life if they let them out. I think you should live the life you want to, how you want to. As long as you are not hurting someone else in the process, it is your life. (This could be explained a lot better, I know, I need an editor to help me put my thoughts into words..... Letitia, I NEED YOU -insert business card!)
I guess what I meant is, I know a lot of people who have went through life changing obstacles. I know several that could be on magazine covers for what they have accomplished, what they have survived, what they have achieved....but they never will be. No one will care, because they aren't famous and it is not breaking news.
I listen to the radio on the way to the Y to swim and every morning I have to flip through stations to find songs because it is either HOLLYWOOD DIRT/CELEBRITY TRIVIA/CELEBRITY NEWS. I get to work and on breaks go to read the news and have to scan through 50 different headlines of whatever crap whatever celebrity is doing/has done/or is going to do. I'll be the first to say I like actors, I mean I have a top 5 list we joke about. I like the part they play in a show. When it comes to their real life, WHO CARES?? I do not know them from the guy that just drove by in his car. Just because I like Paul Spector on The Fall doesn't mean I want to know what Jamie Dornan does on Friday evening at 5pm. Just because I named my bike Dexter doesn't mean I care who Michael Hall is dating! Yes, I agree, the news surrounding Jenner, as my friend Valeria put it, "says a lot about the society we live in...." I agree, this story is different. It also has been done many times before by people who do not have the status and money and popularity that the Kardashian's and Jenner's have. Why can't those stories be told? Aren't they just as telling of our society as Jenner's?
I counted today. I read that the new Fifty Shades of Grey book is being released in at least 7 different headlines. Jenner was in even more. If you go to Yahoo's News page, the first page is all celebrity news. You actually have to search for real news. I like a good story now and then, and yes, I read this one on Jenner, I even read the one on Fifty, but come on, it is a struggle to find non celebrity news online. Now I do read the newspaper every day and go online to the News Gazette, so there is ways to avoid it, but still.
We were at a baby shower and one of the games was to name the celebrity baby name. It was fun, don't get me wrong! Some of the names celebs give their kids are just dreadful!! I think I overheard the answer for one and got that one right, maybe even guessed another. Some people got almost all right. That was baffling to me. I guess it isn't my thing, like watching serial killer shows isn't most people's thing. I guess there just comes a point when I get sick of hearing about Kim K's butt, Lindsay Lohan is in jail again, and Ben and Jen are breaking up..... It just isn't important. So yes, it surprised me today when the top 2 stories were Caitlyn and Fifty. I am sorry for offending anyone, like I said, what Caitlyn/Bruce is doing for herself is great and inspiring to anyone that is hiding their true self. I just feel that we forget that when a celeb does something like that it is remarkable, when a normal average person does it, it is what it is.....
Wednesday, May 20, 2015
Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game...
We have all heard the saying, "Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game." I heard it before that girly movie Cinderella coined it, but yeah, they used it too. In my case it is the fear of drowning, flying off my bike, or walking when I should be running, but you get it. Actually my fear lately is coming in last place, something I am not use to.
I had a breakdown before my Olympic Tri last weekend. I always worry before a race, usually it is about getting sick or injured. If it is a race I have done before I worry about PRing, doing worse than I did before, or not placing in my age group, etc. I am a decent runner. I do pretty well around here. I usually place in my age group, sometimes even first. If I go to a bigger race this isn't always the case, but I place pretty decently among my age and sex. For instance at the IL Marathon I placed in the half marathon 89th out of 2843 women / 389th out of 4936 total / 17th out of 379 female in the 30-34 age group. That's above average and something I have come to expect from myself. So last year at my first Olympic triathlon when I placed 10th out of 10 in my age group with only a handful of people finishing behind me overall, well yeah, I was mortified to say the least. I went instantly from being proud of myself for finishing my first Olympic Tri to being so sad about my placement that I moaned and bitched about it constantly. A year later when it came time to do my next, the bitching turned into panic.
For those of you that do not know what an Olympic Tri is, you start out with a 1500 meter swim, followed by a 24.8 mile bike, finishing with a 10k run. It is harder than it sounds....believe me :) The people I race against make it look easy. Nick Modrzejewski says something like this after we finished Sunday, "Well, I wanted to do 6:00 minute miles for the run but the weather conditions made that hard." Really...really man?! Because I can't do that in the running race let alone after I have biked and swam! He is awesome though, and for him, that is normal! Mike Bucher and Nick assured Aldo and I that are time was good. Nick even went a step above that and told us his first Olympic time was slower than ours, so there is hope for us to turn into Nick someday....haha yeah right!!
Anyway, I was full on panic the week before thinking I would come in last. I almost decided to just say F IT and not go. I even told a few people I just wanted to cross train and not do Tri's anymore. To my surprise I placed 4th out of 10 in my age group and 19th out of 40 women overall. I don't care about overall because those men and some of those women are just insane. I was proud of myself for how much I pushed myself and I got a little confidence back!
That was until yesterday.... I looked up the results from the next Olympic we are doing and we are in for a competitive race. With the time I did at this past one I will come in pretty much last. So I am once again in full panic mode thinking I do not want to do this anymore. Everyone keeps telling me that placement doesn't matter, but I think it would matter if it was them, but maybe not, it shouldn't.
Why do I do this? Why did I look at the results? Why can't I just accept this is a new adventure for me and let it be that....let it just be for fun. I am about to try something this year that most people in their life time would not even consider, may not even know exists. Why am I so hard on myself? I am competitive, we all know this :) But why can I not see that it is good enough to just finish, even if I do come in dead last.
In my group of friends we have a few that are not as fast as the others. They have even named themselves a special name for when they run together. The funny thing is, when you compare them to everyone else, they are fast. They all have run marathon's in 10:00 - 11:00 minute mile pace or under. They think this is slow?? Most people would think that is amazing. It is amazing, we just have high expectations for ourselves. Looking back to when I first started running, to think I could FINISH a marathon, to think I could swim one lap without stopping, or ride my bike 10 miles, these are all things I never thought I could do. Now I am giving myself a hard time, having panic attacks, because I am afraid of doing bad. It is rather silly. I have wrote about this before, tried to get myself over it, I am still dwelling....see?
We all have goals. We all want to be better. Why can't we accept that we are good, while we try to be better? I will probably not finish last. When I finish I will be happy for a few days and then full panic mode will set in until I finish my Half Ironman. I wish I could accept and let it sink in that I am doing something that is amazing. That we all are amazing just for getting out there and pushing ourselves.
I guess when I am being down on myself I am lucky to have amazing friends to tell me to shut the hell up! Tell me please.... Remind me that I am ok, and not to freak out! You all know me by now! Sadly we really do all hang out with amazing people who do awesome in sports that sometimes we compare ourselves instead of look at our own accomplishments. I need to remember my hardest competition is myself, and that is the competition that matters. If I am comparing myself to everyone else and putting myself down because I can't do as well as they do, I will never do as well as I can. And seriously, in this case, all that matters is me!
I had a breakdown before my Olympic Tri last weekend. I always worry before a race, usually it is about getting sick or injured. If it is a race I have done before I worry about PRing, doing worse than I did before, or not placing in my age group, etc. I am a decent runner. I do pretty well around here. I usually place in my age group, sometimes even first. If I go to a bigger race this isn't always the case, but I place pretty decently among my age and sex. For instance at the IL Marathon I placed in the half marathon 89th out of 2843 women / 389th out of 4936 total / 17th out of 379 female in the 30-34 age group. That's above average and something I have come to expect from myself. So last year at my first Olympic triathlon when I placed 10th out of 10 in my age group with only a handful of people finishing behind me overall, well yeah, I was mortified to say the least. I went instantly from being proud of myself for finishing my first Olympic Tri to being so sad about my placement that I moaned and bitched about it constantly. A year later when it came time to do my next, the bitching turned into panic.
For those of you that do not know what an Olympic Tri is, you start out with a 1500 meter swim, followed by a 24.8 mile bike, finishing with a 10k run. It is harder than it sounds....believe me :) The people I race against make it look easy. Nick Modrzejewski says something like this after we finished Sunday, "Well, I wanted to do 6:00 minute miles for the run but the weather conditions made that hard." Really...really man?! Because I can't do that in the running race let alone after I have biked and swam! He is awesome though, and for him, that is normal! Mike Bucher and Nick assured Aldo and I that are time was good. Nick even went a step above that and told us his first Olympic time was slower than ours, so there is hope for us to turn into Nick someday....haha yeah right!!
Anyway, I was full on panic the week before thinking I would come in last. I almost decided to just say F IT and not go. I even told a few people I just wanted to cross train and not do Tri's anymore. To my surprise I placed 4th out of 10 in my age group and 19th out of 40 women overall. I don't care about overall because those men and some of those women are just insane. I was proud of myself for how much I pushed myself and I got a little confidence back!
That was until yesterday.... I looked up the results from the next Olympic we are doing and we are in for a competitive race. With the time I did at this past one I will come in pretty much last. So I am once again in full panic mode thinking I do not want to do this anymore. Everyone keeps telling me that placement doesn't matter, but I think it would matter if it was them, but maybe not, it shouldn't.
Why do I do this? Why did I look at the results? Why can't I just accept this is a new adventure for me and let it be that....let it just be for fun. I am about to try something this year that most people in their life time would not even consider, may not even know exists. Why am I so hard on myself? I am competitive, we all know this :) But why can I not see that it is good enough to just finish, even if I do come in dead last.
In my group of friends we have a few that are not as fast as the others. They have even named themselves a special name for when they run together. The funny thing is, when you compare them to everyone else, they are fast. They all have run marathon's in 10:00 - 11:00 minute mile pace or under. They think this is slow?? Most people would think that is amazing. It is amazing, we just have high expectations for ourselves. Looking back to when I first started running, to think I could FINISH a marathon, to think I could swim one lap without stopping, or ride my bike 10 miles, these are all things I never thought I could do. Now I am giving myself a hard time, having panic attacks, because I am afraid of doing bad. It is rather silly. I have wrote about this before, tried to get myself over it, I am still dwelling....see?
We all have goals. We all want to be better. Why can't we accept that we are good, while we try to be better? I will probably not finish last. When I finish I will be happy for a few days and then full panic mode will set in until I finish my Half Ironman. I wish I could accept and let it sink in that I am doing something that is amazing. That we all are amazing just for getting out there and pushing ourselves.
I guess when I am being down on myself I am lucky to have amazing friends to tell me to shut the hell up! Tell me please.... Remind me that I am ok, and not to freak out! You all know me by now! Sadly we really do all hang out with amazing people who do awesome in sports that sometimes we compare ourselves instead of look at our own accomplishments. I need to remember my hardest competition is myself, and that is the competition that matters. If I am comparing myself to everyone else and putting myself down because I can't do as well as they do, I will never do as well as I can. And seriously, in this case, all that matters is me!
Thursday, April 16, 2015
Nah nah nah nah, hey hey hey, goodbye....
Seven years, one month, and thirteen days ago I walked into a State Farm office to start my first day of work and take the next step in my life....or finally accept that I was a grown up and working at a bar would not be pretty when I was, say 60. I was scared to death. I mean who goes from a job running around constantly with people much younger than you are to an office with two other people, one of which is your mother, where you sit all day long in front of a computer talking insurance. YAWN. However I was given the opportunity and here I am, over seven years later, a changed person. At the end of next week I will say goodbye to the job that has finally made me an adult.
As much as I am ready to run out the door, seven years is a long time. My mom worked there for 20 and the agent I first worked for worked for 40, so 7 isn't actually all that long, but for me it has been the longest job I have kept, the longest relationship I have had. I learned a lot from this experience and as much as I am ready to move on to the next, I do find myself scared, confused, sad, and just filled with anxiety as I gather my things to go.
Along the way I have gained so much. Who can say that they worked with their mother...and enjoyed it. I got to see my mom as someone other than a mom. She became my coworker, my teacher, my friend. I learned from my mom and the customers that she worked with daily that she was a hard worker, an intelligent woman, and an over the top patient and considerate person. Things I took for granted as just having her as my mother, but came to respect and use as a guide in the office environment. With the help of her, I became the hard worker I am today. When she retired a little over a year ago I was sad to see her go, but happy for her and happy to have had the chance to work with her. The customers were sad to see her go as well, which brings up my next point...
Working in an office like I do at State Farm you get to know the customers. Not just the bad, you get to know the good too. The ones you see every month, the ones that ask about your races, notice you are engaged, and generally care for you, and you for them. I have developed relationships, ones that are hard to walk away from even though it is necessary. People I know when they walk out the door this week or next that it may possibly be the last time we meet. I can't tell them goodbye due to circumstances, so to them it is just another day, but to me it is more than that.
Also while working for State Farm I have gained the knowledge of insurance. YAWN. Actually no. I mean most people actually cringe when they need to deal with insurance but now I know why it is important. I have seen it impact people lives. I have seen and dealt with total loss, the unspeakable, the unthinkable...and I know that those people had something in place to take a little of the burden away in their time of need and that makes me see that what I do helps, even if it isn't the most exciting thing.
So I may have a few tears in the next few weeks. This has been a huge change in my life. I got my degree while working at State Farm, met the man I will marry while working there, started running again and making myself healthier while working there, and grown into person I can be proud of and love. So even if I am sad, scared, etc...I am excited to see what the future holds. I hope my next step takes me to an even better experience than this one has, and even though the last year has been one of the hardest I have had, I will leave State Farm knowing that it has been a good experience in my life and has helped me grow!
Thanks State Farm and to all that helped me along the way, especially the last year!
As much as I am ready to run out the door, seven years is a long time. My mom worked there for 20 and the agent I first worked for worked for 40, so 7 isn't actually all that long, but for me it has been the longest job I have kept, the longest relationship I have had. I learned a lot from this experience and as much as I am ready to move on to the next, I do find myself scared, confused, sad, and just filled with anxiety as I gather my things to go.
Along the way I have gained so much. Who can say that they worked with their mother...and enjoyed it. I got to see my mom as someone other than a mom. She became my coworker, my teacher, my friend. I learned from my mom and the customers that she worked with daily that she was a hard worker, an intelligent woman, and an over the top patient and considerate person. Things I took for granted as just having her as my mother, but came to respect and use as a guide in the office environment. With the help of her, I became the hard worker I am today. When she retired a little over a year ago I was sad to see her go, but happy for her and happy to have had the chance to work with her. The customers were sad to see her go as well, which brings up my next point...
Working in an office like I do at State Farm you get to know the customers. Not just the bad, you get to know the good too. The ones you see every month, the ones that ask about your races, notice you are engaged, and generally care for you, and you for them. I have developed relationships, ones that are hard to walk away from even though it is necessary. People I know when they walk out the door this week or next that it may possibly be the last time we meet. I can't tell them goodbye due to circumstances, so to them it is just another day, but to me it is more than that.
Also while working for State Farm I have gained the knowledge of insurance. YAWN. Actually no. I mean most people actually cringe when they need to deal with insurance but now I know why it is important. I have seen it impact people lives. I have seen and dealt with total loss, the unspeakable, the unthinkable...and I know that those people had something in place to take a little of the burden away in their time of need and that makes me see that what I do helps, even if it isn't the most exciting thing.
So I may have a few tears in the next few weeks. This has been a huge change in my life. I got my degree while working at State Farm, met the man I will marry while working there, started running again and making myself healthier while working there, and grown into person I can be proud of and love. So even if I am sad, scared, etc...I am excited to see what the future holds. I hope my next step takes me to an even better experience than this one has, and even though the last year has been one of the hardest I have had, I will leave State Farm knowing that it has been a good experience in my life and has helped me grow!
Thanks State Farm and to all that helped me along the way, especially the last year!
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
March Madness should never cause a short rant...
So I joke that every March I become a basketball fan. Same as every World Series I become a baseball fan. I will never be a Football fan, I watch the Super Bowl only for the fun and commercials. I am the type of person that would much rather PLAY a sport than watch it. Does that mean I am not a fan, um... NO. I have the teams I like, teams I have liked since I was a child. Most of the time I have a vague awareness of how these teams are doing, but I am not one to plant myself for hours in front of the tube to watch these teams. Now give me tickets to a baseball, basketball, soccer, and most definitely hockey game, I am there.
So when I was asked certain questions about "liking basketball" all the sudden during the tournament, I was kind of offended. I am obviously a sports girl, so just because I am not up on the latest scoreboard stats, why is it so damn surprising that I am cheering for a team. Yes I tend to only get involved when it is a big tournament, but that doesn't mean I do not like my teams. So having to explain why I wanted to watch a certain game or why I liked the teams I did, sort of offended me. So what if I picked Notre Dame and Michigan State to play in the finals. Yes it was a pretty silly pick, but they both played like winning teams at times in the tournament. I have my own reasons for picking and liking the teams I do, frankly which is only my business, but I will explain why when asked. It just shouldn't be that surprising that someone who spend 6 days a week, sometimes 2 times a day working out, would like sports.
However... Lots of my friends are year long runners. We have ourselves a laugh every March when the seasonal runners return to the streets. We joke about how the real runners have been running outside all winter. I even got a little annoyed this past month when the seasonal swimmers returned to the Y to swim, taking up the lanes. I was pissed because I was there all winter swimming and now the are back crowding the place. Quick to judge people, just like those people were quick to judge me. I guess I should listen to my own rant haha. I mean, I do not really know why these people do not sport all year round, there could be a number of reasons, frankly which are none of my business, but I shouldn't judge.
That is really all this is about. Silly perhaps but all the same, you really shouldn't be surprised by information you do not know about a person, that is not really your business to know, guess, judge, etc....
I mean, I like serial killer books, movies, etc.... but do not be surprised if I am passed a romantic comedy once in awhile and happen to enjoy it!
I am currently looking at my bird feeder and laughing because it is being shared by a squirrel and a bird. I guess if they can find a way to share a small feeder and let each eat in peace without questioning, we should accept as a world that we may not know people the way we think we do, and we should not be so quick to judge.
On that note....thank god basketball is over. Duke sucks! Go CUBS!!!
So when I was asked certain questions about "liking basketball" all the sudden during the tournament, I was kind of offended. I am obviously a sports girl, so just because I am not up on the latest scoreboard stats, why is it so damn surprising that I am cheering for a team. Yes I tend to only get involved when it is a big tournament, but that doesn't mean I do not like my teams. So having to explain why I wanted to watch a certain game or why I liked the teams I did, sort of offended me. So what if I picked Notre Dame and Michigan State to play in the finals. Yes it was a pretty silly pick, but they both played like winning teams at times in the tournament. I have my own reasons for picking and liking the teams I do, frankly which is only my business, but I will explain why when asked. It just shouldn't be that surprising that someone who spend 6 days a week, sometimes 2 times a day working out, would like sports.
However... Lots of my friends are year long runners. We have ourselves a laugh every March when the seasonal runners return to the streets. We joke about how the real runners have been running outside all winter. I even got a little annoyed this past month when the seasonal swimmers returned to the Y to swim, taking up the lanes. I was pissed because I was there all winter swimming and now the are back crowding the place. Quick to judge people, just like those people were quick to judge me. I guess I should listen to my own rant haha. I mean, I do not really know why these people do not sport all year round, there could be a number of reasons, frankly which are none of my business, but I shouldn't judge.
That is really all this is about. Silly perhaps but all the same, you really shouldn't be surprised by information you do not know about a person, that is not really your business to know, guess, judge, etc....
I mean, I like serial killer books, movies, etc.... but do not be surprised if I am passed a romantic comedy once in awhile and happen to enjoy it!
I am currently looking at my bird feeder and laughing because it is being shared by a squirrel and a bird. I guess if they can find a way to share a small feeder and let each eat in peace without questioning, we should accept as a world that we may not know people the way we think we do, and we should not be so quick to judge.
On that note....thank god basketball is over. Duke sucks! Go CUBS!!!
Sunday, March 1, 2015
The grass is greener on my side, just not today...
We have all been told, the grass isn't always greener on the other side, someone has it worse off than you. In running you are always reminded that someone is always slower, faster, stronger, etc. I have been thinking a lot about running lately. Usually when I am thinking about it I am also feeling sorry for myself because I am still dealing with my injury. The injury that everyone has to be sick of hearing about because I am sick of typing it. I am sure if that app popped up trying to find the words most associated with my Facebook page, injury, running, bacon, and serial killers would pop up. What is wrong with me... I scare myself.
So up until 2 weeks ago I was coming along fine with my marathon training. Everything felt good. I was training smart, not running too much. Do you ever have that moment where you know you did something you are going to regret? I don't mean eating another piece of cake, or having too many beers and wondering if you should have kissed you know who, I mean that moment when the run felt so damn good but you know you are going to regret it later? I had that.
So I had to run 16 by myself. Miles, yes 16 miles for my non running friends. I know I have like 5 of them :) It was 5pm when I started, I was hungry, cold, and wanted it done. I started the first 6 miles out a little fast but they felt ok. My longer runs are supposed to be at 9:00 pace but I run with Michele and well, we always go faster. (Always the competitive ones aren't we!) Anyway I was hitting about 8:40 pace. After the first 10 I took a honey stinger waffle break and headed back out just wanted to get the 6 done. Well, I did, in record pace.... I would later tell people that the following week when doing my 18 mile run I looked at my watch at 15 miles and was only 2 minutes slower than what I had ran the 16 miles the week before. Yeah. I ran too fast. Most of the time this is a great thing, but when you are training for a marathon, you need to train right. My body basically thought it ran a marathon. I did not give it time to recover after that, and the pain started...
My hamstring started warning me, it was tight for a few days. I kept running hoping it would go away but it only got worse and hurt enough I couldn't walk correctly let alone run. I was smart at this point, iced and took sometime off only to find out that my hip was hurting again. Not sure if there was/is a correlation, since all my pain is on my right side, but it is a definite warning. When the hip speaks I listen. I mean, it has obviously had a mind of its own for 1.5 years now and it demands to be heard. F@*K!!
Anyway. I had a few days of feeling sorry for myself. A few tears, a few eye rolls from Cory, a few worries from my mom, and a few "not this again" for my friends. I was pissed, not gonna lie. In 2014, I listened to my friends successes, their PRs, and I was a good sport. Damnit it is my time to shine. It is someone else's turn to have an injury (just none of my friends please). About this time I saw a Facebook post from a friend that said something special was gonna take place at the armory last Wednesday night. Another friend said he was going to the armory to watch a certain girl we all love run. What? Come again?? Did you say Murelle is running? When did I miss this? Oh yeah I was wallowing in my own self pity, that's when I missed it. Well, since I couldn't run there is no one in the world I would rather see run again than Murelle. You got that right, I would pick her to see run over myself, over Meb, over anyone.
And she ran. And it was the most heart warming, inspirational experience I have had in a long time. It changed my attitude completely. For a girl who is only 15, she has been through more than most of us will go through in a lifetime, and come out on the other side running with a smile.
I was driving home after that, my heart full, my mind at ease for the first time in days, and I realized, it could be a lot worse. I can still run, maybe not as far as I want, but hey, to be honest, I did not really like the long runs anyway. Funny. I was so upset that I would not be able to do the marathon but when I actually stopped and thought about it, I did not even care. I enjoy speed work, and tempo runs. I enjoy swim training with Mike (even when I swallow a ton of water), and I enjoy long grueling trainer sessions while watching Blacklist or some serial killer show. I even enjoy strength and core. But when I wake up and have a long run it just annoys me to death. I had a goal and when my goal was disturbed I got mad. That was why I was feeling sorry for myself. Isn't that ridiculous?
So I want to thank Murelle again. Thank you for being the person you are. The inspiration in all our lives. When someone asks me who my hero is, I do not say Meb, Kara, Paula, or one of the other top runners, I say Murelle. She has taught me more than any of those people have ever taught me. Mainly, that my life is great. Obstacles come and go, some are harder than others. Each of us have battles, but it is how we come out of the battle that defines us. Do I want to come out complaining and feeling sorry for myself, or do I want to come out running, with a smile, and a 100 people shouting my name with tears in their eyes because I have brought hope to their hearts. Yeah, I think I will choose Murelle's way....
The grass is greener on my side, sometimes I just need to dig through a foot of snow to remember...
So up until 2 weeks ago I was coming along fine with my marathon training. Everything felt good. I was training smart, not running too much. Do you ever have that moment where you know you did something you are going to regret? I don't mean eating another piece of cake, or having too many beers and wondering if you should have kissed you know who, I mean that moment when the run felt so damn good but you know you are going to regret it later? I had that.
So I had to run 16 by myself. Miles, yes 16 miles for my non running friends. I know I have like 5 of them :) It was 5pm when I started, I was hungry, cold, and wanted it done. I started the first 6 miles out a little fast but they felt ok. My longer runs are supposed to be at 9:00 pace but I run with Michele and well, we always go faster. (Always the competitive ones aren't we!) Anyway I was hitting about 8:40 pace. After the first 10 I took a honey stinger waffle break and headed back out just wanted to get the 6 done. Well, I did, in record pace.... I would later tell people that the following week when doing my 18 mile run I looked at my watch at 15 miles and was only 2 minutes slower than what I had ran the 16 miles the week before. Yeah. I ran too fast. Most of the time this is a great thing, but when you are training for a marathon, you need to train right. My body basically thought it ran a marathon. I did not give it time to recover after that, and the pain started...
My hamstring started warning me, it was tight for a few days. I kept running hoping it would go away but it only got worse and hurt enough I couldn't walk correctly let alone run. I was smart at this point, iced and took sometime off only to find out that my hip was hurting again. Not sure if there was/is a correlation, since all my pain is on my right side, but it is a definite warning. When the hip speaks I listen. I mean, it has obviously had a mind of its own for 1.5 years now and it demands to be heard. F@*K!!
Anyway. I had a few days of feeling sorry for myself. A few tears, a few eye rolls from Cory, a few worries from my mom, and a few "not this again" for my friends. I was pissed, not gonna lie. In 2014, I listened to my friends successes, their PRs, and I was a good sport. Damnit it is my time to shine. It is someone else's turn to have an injury (just none of my friends please). About this time I saw a Facebook post from a friend that said something special was gonna take place at the armory last Wednesday night. Another friend said he was going to the armory to watch a certain girl we all love run. What? Come again?? Did you say Murelle is running? When did I miss this? Oh yeah I was wallowing in my own self pity, that's when I missed it. Well, since I couldn't run there is no one in the world I would rather see run again than Murelle. You got that right, I would pick her to see run over myself, over Meb, over anyone.
And she ran. And it was the most heart warming, inspirational experience I have had in a long time. It changed my attitude completely. For a girl who is only 15, she has been through more than most of us will go through in a lifetime, and come out on the other side running with a smile.
I was driving home after that, my heart full, my mind at ease for the first time in days, and I realized, it could be a lot worse. I can still run, maybe not as far as I want, but hey, to be honest, I did not really like the long runs anyway. Funny. I was so upset that I would not be able to do the marathon but when I actually stopped and thought about it, I did not even care. I enjoy speed work, and tempo runs. I enjoy swim training with Mike (even when I swallow a ton of water), and I enjoy long grueling trainer sessions while watching Blacklist or some serial killer show. I even enjoy strength and core. But when I wake up and have a long run it just annoys me to death. I had a goal and when my goal was disturbed I got mad. That was why I was feeling sorry for myself. Isn't that ridiculous?
So I want to thank Murelle again. Thank you for being the person you are. The inspiration in all our lives. When someone asks me who my hero is, I do not say Meb, Kara, Paula, or one of the other top runners, I say Murelle. She has taught me more than any of those people have ever taught me. Mainly, that my life is great. Obstacles come and go, some are harder than others. Each of us have battles, but it is how we come out of the battle that defines us. Do I want to come out complaining and feeling sorry for myself, or do I want to come out running, with a smile, and a 100 people shouting my name with tears in their eyes because I have brought hope to their hearts. Yeah, I think I will choose Murelle's way....
The grass is greener on my side, sometimes I just need to dig through a foot of snow to remember...
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Ironman Training really means Ironman Eating....
So here I am, almost finished with my second week of training for the Illinois Marathon, which is going towards training for the Racine Half Ironman in July. I remember saying a year ago in a SWRC newsletter article how I would NEVER participate in triathlons. This is why Cory rolled his eyes at me when I said that. He knew. He knows I am stubborn. I found a way to get around the doctor's suggestion of not doing running races. HAHAHA! Yah. This is going to be a little harder. So stubborn as I am, I have my work cut out for me.
So far though, I am enjoying eating, I mean training... I do eat ALL THE TIME. I am not into actual heavy duty training yet. I hate to see the grocery bill then. Seriously, what's up with all these skinny triathletes? Do they not have the appetite I do? They obviously have a secret because when I am not working out I am eating or sleeping. I have gained back 4 of the 4 pounds I lost. Yep all 4 dammit. Here is when you tell me it is muscle and I tell myself that too, but really, it has been two weeks so I think it may be the 15 meals I eat a day, just saying. Haha.
So besides that side effect, it is seriously going well. For the marathon I am using a plan from a book a few friends suggested. The book is my new best friend. Seriously I take it everywhere, It basically is a guideline for every workout. My buddy Aldo gave me the best gift last night and told me there is an APP for the book!! There is an APP for everything! So now I will just carry my phone around and that works because I do that anyway! So this book, Run Less Run Faster, gives you a plan that you run 3 days a week and do 2 cross training days. I added in another cross training and a strength and core workout, which the book says is ok to do. Now I am sure all my running buds are thinking that this is a doomed plan because that won't give me enough mileage. We will see, but besides the people who I know made it through with this plan and that I idolize, many others have said this plan works and works well!
So for the plan you base off a recent 5k time, and the book gives you charts for all your runs. The three runs emphasize quality over quantity so there are no wasted (fun/recovery) runs. They refer to them as wasted miles. I am a runner so that term I didn't really care for, but understand what they mean. Instead of doing a slow easy recovery run, they fill it with cross training. This works well for me since I am supposed to be doing just that :)!!
My week looks a little like this:
Monday: Swim Training. Late last year I happened to be wearing my Stoneman Sprint swim cap one day at the Y when another swimmer asked me how the tri went. Since then Mike Hall and I have become friends and he has given me great advice and even takes the time to teach me some swim drills. He has his hands full, I am stubborn and my damn elbows do not want to do what they should haha! But he has taught me some drills that I practice (they are hard) and I can't wait till I can start swimming as fast as him! Because I will Mike. You just wait ;)
Tuesday: Speed work. First week was 3 x 1600 at 7:02 pace. Second week was 4 x 800 at 6:42 pace. I swear on the treadmill I feel like I am sprinting. I have a feeling I may fly off of it one of these times!! They are supposed to be challenging though and I can tell they will help me in the long run. Heehee get it, see what I did there? Long run! haha!
Wednesday: Spin and Core day. The book gives me some spin workouts that making spinning just a little more tolerable. Now a 30 minute spin only feels like an hour of history class with a monotone teacher instead of 3 hours. After spin I do some planks, bridges, dead bugs, etc.
Thursday: My double workout day. In the mornings I practice swim drills and do a combination of swimming and kick boarding activities I get from the book. The evenings I do a tempo run. The first week was hard. I was exhausted from work and working out and eating. I had to do 2 easy miles, then 2 at 7:30 pace (yah sure I did 7:47 on the treadmill) and then 2 easy again. I hated that day more than any day so far. This week my swim went well and for the run I had 1 mile warm up, 5 at marathon pace which is 8:50 , and 1 mile cool down. I ran with my bud Aldo, who is also starting the plan I am using so that is super awesome, and we averaged 9:00 for all 7 miles so we called that a win since there was random ice patches and cars that wouldn't share the road! This run went well!!
Friday: Day off. Yes I get a day off and yes I am taking it. I will eat A LOT and drink a beer and enjoy every minute of it.
Saturday: The "man I wish I didn't eat so much all week before my Long Run" day. Yes this is the long run day. The book gives you different paces but since I am a pace leader for a training group I am sticking with 9:00 minute pace. The book gives two long run plans. One is super easy and the other has 5 - 20 mile days. I am going somewhere in the middle because the easy plan is too easy and I am crazy but I am not crazy enough to do 5 - 20 mile days, are you serious?
Sunday - easy spin warm up or jump rope and strength training.
Then it starts all over.
I am keeping a journal of how I feel, what I eat (this part is only what I eat while working out because they do not make a book that big), and how my workout goes. I am seriously enjoying it so far. Some days I wake up and want to shut my alarm off but I know this is NO WHERE even close to what I will have to do for the full IM so I better get my butt in gear. Actually my IM friends probably do this plan when they are not training, right Mike?? haha!
The one thing I was seriously worried about was being alone for this training. I missed my crazy friends a lot last year while I was out with my hip stress fracture. It has been the opposite. Almost all my workouts I have had a friend join. V came to swim, Mike is there for half of my swims and my speed works, Cory rows while I spin and do strength / core, and Aldo and Michele have also ran with me. My SWRC and Y friends are there on the other times! I think this is good for me. I think this is the start of a wonderful thing! If I could just stop eating! and BEST OF ALL......
NO HIP PAIN!
See you in a few weeks..... :)
So far though, I am enjoying eating, I mean training... I do eat ALL THE TIME. I am not into actual heavy duty training yet. I hate to see the grocery bill then. Seriously, what's up with all these skinny triathletes? Do they not have the appetite I do? They obviously have a secret because when I am not working out I am eating or sleeping. I have gained back 4 of the 4 pounds I lost. Yep all 4 dammit. Here is when you tell me it is muscle and I tell myself that too, but really, it has been two weeks so I think it may be the 15 meals I eat a day, just saying. Haha.
So besides that side effect, it is seriously going well. For the marathon I am using a plan from a book a few friends suggested. The book is my new best friend. Seriously I take it everywhere, It basically is a guideline for every workout. My buddy Aldo gave me the best gift last night and told me there is an APP for the book!! There is an APP for everything! So now I will just carry my phone around and that works because I do that anyway! So this book, Run Less Run Faster, gives you a plan that you run 3 days a week and do 2 cross training days. I added in another cross training and a strength and core workout, which the book says is ok to do. Now I am sure all my running buds are thinking that this is a doomed plan because that won't give me enough mileage. We will see, but besides the people who I know made it through with this plan and that I idolize, many others have said this plan works and works well!
So for the plan you base off a recent 5k time, and the book gives you charts for all your runs. The three runs emphasize quality over quantity so there are no wasted (fun/recovery) runs. They refer to them as wasted miles. I am a runner so that term I didn't really care for, but understand what they mean. Instead of doing a slow easy recovery run, they fill it with cross training. This works well for me since I am supposed to be doing just that :)!!
My week looks a little like this:
Monday: Swim Training. Late last year I happened to be wearing my Stoneman Sprint swim cap one day at the Y when another swimmer asked me how the tri went. Since then Mike Hall and I have become friends and he has given me great advice and even takes the time to teach me some swim drills. He has his hands full, I am stubborn and my damn elbows do not want to do what they should haha! But he has taught me some drills that I practice (they are hard) and I can't wait till I can start swimming as fast as him! Because I will Mike. You just wait ;)
Tuesday: Speed work. First week was 3 x 1600 at 7:02 pace. Second week was 4 x 800 at 6:42 pace. I swear on the treadmill I feel like I am sprinting. I have a feeling I may fly off of it one of these times!! They are supposed to be challenging though and I can tell they will help me in the long run. Heehee get it, see what I did there? Long run! haha!
Wednesday: Spin and Core day. The book gives me some spin workouts that making spinning just a little more tolerable. Now a 30 minute spin only feels like an hour of history class with a monotone teacher instead of 3 hours. After spin I do some planks, bridges, dead bugs, etc.
Thursday: My double workout day. In the mornings I practice swim drills and do a combination of swimming and kick boarding activities I get from the book. The evenings I do a tempo run. The first week was hard. I was exhausted from work and working out and eating. I had to do 2 easy miles, then 2 at 7:30 pace (yah sure I did 7:47 on the treadmill) and then 2 easy again. I hated that day more than any day so far. This week my swim went well and for the run I had 1 mile warm up, 5 at marathon pace which is 8:50 , and 1 mile cool down. I ran with my bud Aldo, who is also starting the plan I am using so that is super awesome, and we averaged 9:00 for all 7 miles so we called that a win since there was random ice patches and cars that wouldn't share the road! This run went well!!
Friday: Day off. Yes I get a day off and yes I am taking it. I will eat A LOT and drink a beer and enjoy every minute of it.
Saturday: The "man I wish I didn't eat so much all week before my Long Run" day. Yes this is the long run day. The book gives you different paces but since I am a pace leader for a training group I am sticking with 9:00 minute pace. The book gives two long run plans. One is super easy and the other has 5 - 20 mile days. I am going somewhere in the middle because the easy plan is too easy and I am crazy but I am not crazy enough to do 5 - 20 mile days, are you serious?
Sunday - easy spin warm up or jump rope and strength training.
Then it starts all over.
I am keeping a journal of how I feel, what I eat (this part is only what I eat while working out because they do not make a book that big), and how my workout goes. I am seriously enjoying it so far. Some days I wake up and want to shut my alarm off but I know this is NO WHERE even close to what I will have to do for the full IM so I better get my butt in gear. Actually my IM friends probably do this plan when they are not training, right Mike?? haha!
The one thing I was seriously worried about was being alone for this training. I missed my crazy friends a lot last year while I was out with my hip stress fracture. It has been the opposite. Almost all my workouts I have had a friend join. V came to swim, Mike is there for half of my swims and my speed works, Cory rows while I spin and do strength / core, and Aldo and Michele have also ran with me. My SWRC and Y friends are there on the other times! I think this is good for me. I think this is the start of a wonderful thing! If I could just stop eating! and BEST OF ALL......
NO HIP PAIN!
See you in a few weeks..... :)
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