I knew going into training for a half ironman I would be facing challenges. My body still recovering from a hip stress fracture, the reason this crazy adventure started, would be the biggest challenge itself right? Nah. Not at all. I am going to go back to grade school now and draw my bubble with stems off of it to create my intro, 3 body paragraphs, and conclusion here. Haha just kidding! Funny however being a triathlete that I am going to group this into the 3 (get it TRI) areas that have really just been trying during this adventure. Was that an accurate thesis statement? :)
So when I started I was mainly worried about my hip acting up. At the beginning of the year when I was training for the marathon and got to the 18-20 mile runs I felt the pain come back so I backed off and did the half marathon instead, and the pain went away. Woohoo! Smart girl! Well my half IM training was going smoothly and without silly pain until I decided to go out and conquer Mountain Goat hills with my bike and let's just say the hip and hamstring did not agree that Mountain Goat was a fun, good idea like I thought. When training for a half IM and you are 4 weeks out you can't really just back off and I am sure not going to skip it. I am already one wetsuit down and I am not going to add a paid half IM and 6 months of training to it. But I was once again a good girl and went and saw my PT and she told me to roll and stretch. I have been like a freaking superstar. And the pain is....yah, nope it is still there. It is less and I am working through it but it is still there. I can't really expect it to go away putting 80 miles on the bike and 15 on my feet in two days though. I will be a good girl and take some time off....starting July 20th :) That is the first challenge, on to stem number 2.
Money. I am broke. I do not mean I am missing out on area races because I decided to do a big race broke, I mean I am flat broke. Yes I took a slight pay cut to be in a happier job position, but holy crap being a triathlete is expensive. Notice how running is more popular, it isn't because it is easier, it is because it is cheaper!! Ok I am kidding here, I respect all of my triathlete friends MORE than anyone can EVER know. I respect their wallets too. I know a guy that does 3, IM a year. That is $750! FOR ONE OF THEM...and I mean just race entry. That doesn't include travel, board, food, and all the upkeep on race equipment. I remember my friend Mike and me adding up our races a few years back and we had spent like $700 on race fees and were all proud and could not believe how much we had spent. I spent that on equipment. I have done 4 races this year and spent over $700. WTF!!! So you can only imagine the B***H that I became when my wetsuit was stolen 2 days after I bought it. You have got to be F ing kidding me. I will tell you what, the person who came up with IM is probably one rich son of a genius. So yah I am broke. Who wants to buy me a beer tonight? Ok, the last stem, the one I did not expect, the one that has been the most trying...
Relationships. Time. I remember one friend telling me that doing an IM is the most selfish thing you can ever do to a spouse. Another told me she spent 20 hours a week training for her IM. 20 freaking hours. Yes folks, you train like it is a part time job because an IM is not an easy task and if you do not train you will not finish. I am afraid I won't finish the Half IM and I have trained well. Very well, I am very proud of myself. It is very straining to your relationships. This weekend I trained for 5 hours on Saturday and 3 hours Sunday. I was a tired mess. Cory wants me to hang out with him, go on bike rides, stay up and watch movies. It is not his fault I am tired but week after week of going through this gets to him. I do not want to clean or do extra stuff because I have already done so much. I do not feel like going out for drinks with friends or going over to my moms for dinner. I mean, I have fun once I get my butt up and go out but it is trying to even put on makeup and do my hair sometimes. I definitely have used training as an excuse and some friends and family have been hurt by it, mostly Cory, because he gets a front row viewing of it all. He sees when I am tired, hears when I am hurt, helps me because I am broke, and still cheers me along the way. I definitely have him, my parents, and friends to thank once this is all said and done! For helping me and putting up with my grouchy ass! :)
Ok this isn't another stem, I just wanted to separate it because it is the most trying of all the tri's... my relationship with myself. I do not know how many times in the past 3 months I have told myself I CAN NOT do this. It is a constant battle in my head. I am so pessimistic about this race, For each Olympic we have done in preparation I have had a constant battle in my head the week before. I have been so down in the dumps and hard on myself. I think this has taken the toughest toll on my relationship with myself. I know that half of the bike and probably most of the run will be accomplished with my brain. I need to be able to be positive, not compare myself with others, and do the best I can. Sadly this is also the hardest part for me. I have voiced my worries and had several friends who are IM say that I am fine, and I will surprise myself, and this and that. I remember when my friend was doing his first half marathon and he was freaking out and I kept thinking, "it is only 13 miles dude." Yah I was an ass. He had never done it, of course he was nervous and worried. Sometimes I want to say, "HEY IM, this is my first too!" I am sure a half is easy to an IM but it is daunting to me. I just need to remember that it is my race, not my friends, not the person next to me in the swim/bike/run. I hope to come back with an awesome The Terrific Tales of the Triathlete afterwards haha. I just need to calm down and race my race. Regardless I have learned a lot about myself through the training, mostly that I am a heck of a lot stronger than I thought I was and that I can go a lot longer and harder than I thought I could. I just need those happy thoughts for my race.
Happy thoughts! :) (Yes that is my closing paragraph) That says enough!
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
Fifty Shades of Caitlyn Jenner
So I seemed to have lit a small fire with my post. I try to stay away from political, religious, etc topics so I avoid this, but once in awhile I feel an itch and post something other than my latest workout or serial killer fantasy. Oops.
I think I was misunderstood. I often am. I talk a lot, most of the time in circles not making sense, and a lot of the time saying something that someone will not exactly agree with! Hey I tell how I feel, what I think. This is not always the best thing but you can rest assured that I am honest! So there is that.
As for my post today, and if you did not see it it was this:
"Just heard that Caitlyn Jenner (Bruce) got more twitter followers in 4 hours than President Obama. This is what the world has come to.... :("
I meant in no way any disrespect for Caitlyn/Bruce lifestyle/choices/etc. I think anyone that steps out and lives their life the way they want to with no regrets and no worries about others judging, that is remarkable and something to be proud of. (I know I for one worry way to much about what people think of me.... I am writing this post because I am worried I upset people!) I have witnessed and stood by many friends that have kept secrets because of what they would do to their life if they let them out. I think you should live the life you want to, how you want to. As long as you are not hurting someone else in the process, it is your life. (This could be explained a lot better, I know, I need an editor to help me put my thoughts into words..... Letitia, I NEED YOU -insert business card!)
I guess what I meant is, I know a lot of people who have went through life changing obstacles. I know several that could be on magazine covers for what they have accomplished, what they have survived, what they have achieved....but they never will be. No one will care, because they aren't famous and it is not breaking news.
I listen to the radio on the way to the Y to swim and every morning I have to flip through stations to find songs because it is either HOLLYWOOD DIRT/CELEBRITY TRIVIA/CELEBRITY NEWS. I get to work and on breaks go to read the news and have to scan through 50 different headlines of whatever crap whatever celebrity is doing/has done/or is going to do. I'll be the first to say I like actors, I mean I have a top 5 list we joke about. I like the part they play in a show. When it comes to their real life, WHO CARES?? I do not know them from the guy that just drove by in his car. Just because I like Paul Spector on The Fall doesn't mean I want to know what Jamie Dornan does on Friday evening at 5pm. Just because I named my bike Dexter doesn't mean I care who Michael Hall is dating! Yes, I agree, the news surrounding Jenner, as my friend Valeria put it, "says a lot about the society we live in...." I agree, this story is different. It also has been done many times before by people who do not have the status and money and popularity that the Kardashian's and Jenner's have. Why can't those stories be told? Aren't they just as telling of our society as Jenner's?
I counted today. I read that the new Fifty Shades of Grey book is being released in at least 7 different headlines. Jenner was in even more. If you go to Yahoo's News page, the first page is all celebrity news. You actually have to search for real news. I like a good story now and then, and yes, I read this one on Jenner, I even read the one on Fifty, but come on, it is a struggle to find non celebrity news online. Now I do read the newspaper every day and go online to the News Gazette, so there is ways to avoid it, but still.
We were at a baby shower and one of the games was to name the celebrity baby name. It was fun, don't get me wrong! Some of the names celebs give their kids are just dreadful!! I think I overheard the answer for one and got that one right, maybe even guessed another. Some people got almost all right. That was baffling to me. I guess it isn't my thing, like watching serial killer shows isn't most people's thing. I guess there just comes a point when I get sick of hearing about Kim K's butt, Lindsay Lohan is in jail again, and Ben and Jen are breaking up..... It just isn't important. So yes, it surprised me today when the top 2 stories were Caitlyn and Fifty. I am sorry for offending anyone, like I said, what Caitlyn/Bruce is doing for herself is great and inspiring to anyone that is hiding their true self. I just feel that we forget that when a celeb does something like that it is remarkable, when a normal average person does it, it is what it is.....
I think I was misunderstood. I often am. I talk a lot, most of the time in circles not making sense, and a lot of the time saying something that someone will not exactly agree with! Hey I tell how I feel, what I think. This is not always the best thing but you can rest assured that I am honest! So there is that.
As for my post today, and if you did not see it it was this:
"Just heard that Caitlyn Jenner (Bruce) got more twitter followers in 4 hours than President Obama. This is what the world has come to.... :("
I meant in no way any disrespect for Caitlyn/Bruce lifestyle/choices/etc. I think anyone that steps out and lives their life the way they want to with no regrets and no worries about others judging, that is remarkable and something to be proud of. (I know I for one worry way to much about what people think of me.... I am writing this post because I am worried I upset people!) I have witnessed and stood by many friends that have kept secrets because of what they would do to their life if they let them out. I think you should live the life you want to, how you want to. As long as you are not hurting someone else in the process, it is your life. (This could be explained a lot better, I know, I need an editor to help me put my thoughts into words..... Letitia, I NEED YOU -insert business card!)
I guess what I meant is, I know a lot of people who have went through life changing obstacles. I know several that could be on magazine covers for what they have accomplished, what they have survived, what they have achieved....but they never will be. No one will care, because they aren't famous and it is not breaking news.
I listen to the radio on the way to the Y to swim and every morning I have to flip through stations to find songs because it is either HOLLYWOOD DIRT/CELEBRITY TRIVIA/CELEBRITY NEWS. I get to work and on breaks go to read the news and have to scan through 50 different headlines of whatever crap whatever celebrity is doing/has done/or is going to do. I'll be the first to say I like actors, I mean I have a top 5 list we joke about. I like the part they play in a show. When it comes to their real life, WHO CARES?? I do not know them from the guy that just drove by in his car. Just because I like Paul Spector on The Fall doesn't mean I want to know what Jamie Dornan does on Friday evening at 5pm. Just because I named my bike Dexter doesn't mean I care who Michael Hall is dating! Yes, I agree, the news surrounding Jenner, as my friend Valeria put it, "says a lot about the society we live in...." I agree, this story is different. It also has been done many times before by people who do not have the status and money and popularity that the Kardashian's and Jenner's have. Why can't those stories be told? Aren't they just as telling of our society as Jenner's?
I counted today. I read that the new Fifty Shades of Grey book is being released in at least 7 different headlines. Jenner was in even more. If you go to Yahoo's News page, the first page is all celebrity news. You actually have to search for real news. I like a good story now and then, and yes, I read this one on Jenner, I even read the one on Fifty, but come on, it is a struggle to find non celebrity news online. Now I do read the newspaper every day and go online to the News Gazette, so there is ways to avoid it, but still.
We were at a baby shower and one of the games was to name the celebrity baby name. It was fun, don't get me wrong! Some of the names celebs give their kids are just dreadful!! I think I overheard the answer for one and got that one right, maybe even guessed another. Some people got almost all right. That was baffling to me. I guess it isn't my thing, like watching serial killer shows isn't most people's thing. I guess there just comes a point when I get sick of hearing about Kim K's butt, Lindsay Lohan is in jail again, and Ben and Jen are breaking up..... It just isn't important. So yes, it surprised me today when the top 2 stories were Caitlyn and Fifty. I am sorry for offending anyone, like I said, what Caitlyn/Bruce is doing for herself is great and inspiring to anyone that is hiding their true self. I just feel that we forget that when a celeb does something like that it is remarkable, when a normal average person does it, it is what it is.....
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