So I guess I should give some background... some more words to keep you all in suspense, haha. It will all make more sense if I give some background to it. Explain Cory and myself to you all.
Most people questioned Cory and me as a couple when we first started dating. We are different in many ways. He is quiet, intelligent, mysterious, and shy. He is very introverted. He keeps to himself, thinks about everything he says and does, and is perfectly happy spending a Saturday night with a good book or movie, or studying on his computer. I am the complete opposite...as most of you know! :) I am loud, funny, an open book. I say how I feel, show how I feel, YELL how I feel! I am very extroverted, and I love nothing more to surround myself with friends and family. I am perfectly happy spending my Saturday night hanging out with friends singing karaoke, playing games with friends, having a movie night with friends. I love to be with people. So yah, you would think we couldn't be more opposite. Oddly, opposite is how we work. Strangely, if you look past all of that, we have a lot in common.
I think people are quick to judge a person. Never judge a book by it's cover, a day by it's morning sky, a person by their color, or a couple by their traits. I think one of the most interesting things about our relationship is how different we are when it is just us, or when we are with just our families. I have often fought with Cory because we go out and people find him rude, or ask if he doesn't like them. I will sometimes still get upset, but I have to remind myself that we are different.
So in order to understand the proposal more, to understand us more, I want to give some background. When I told Cory I was writing this, he asked me why? Why was I writing about it, he didn't do it in anyway special. That is where he is so wrong. I am not the type of girl who wants to be asked on top a mountain, on a nice trip, or at a planned place where everything is planned perfectly to the minute. That is not me. I wanted simple and from the heart. I got a simple proposal in a way but there was so much more behind it that it meant more to me than any grand gesture would have meant to another. I have always told Cory, I don't care about the ring, I just want us to be together. Hell I never wear jewelry besides my running watch! I once joked he could propose to me with a new running watch and I would be more than happy. Well, I got the watch, and a beautiful ring to go with it. He remembers the details. He listens to what I say. That is very important to me, it means the most to me.
So how we met... I am getting there people be patient :) We met at a bar. HAHA right! I know I know, you won't meet the man you are going to marry in a bar. I did heehee! I worked at a local bar and we both played on a pool league. One night I was sitting at the bar with my phone in my pocket and it kept falling out. The fourth time it fell he leaned over and suggested I put it elsewhere and he smiled. He has a really nice smile. Right Lisa DeAngelis and Ashley Gossett Merder?! We talked about his smile a lot in the next few weeks haha! I had to ask him out in the next few weeks. He later told me he never would have because he was too shy. He did all the things guys just don't really do anymore. He opened my door, pulled out my chair, ordered my dinner for me. He amazed me. He wouldn't answer his damn phone though haha. But after a few months I already knew I was in love. After two years we moved in together! And now, a few months short of 6 years, we are finally engaged. He is the first person I have ever dated that I feel 100% comfortable around. I remember when we first met I would barely eat in front of him. Most nights now I eat more than him and he probably wants that shy girl back that doesn't take down so much food! I also feel completely open telling him how I feel, what I am worried about, when he drives me absolutely crazy, etc. He is by definition a best friend and I would take nothing less in the man I want to marry. I can tell him anything and know it is safe. I feel completely safe. Every night before bed we have a cute routine. REMEMBER THIS! I say, "I love you baby." He says, "I love you too." I say, "I love you more!" He says, "Probably..." Such the romantic!
Ok. Almost there. Just one more detail.... Every Christmas my family does our celebration on Christmas Day. We come back from Cory's parents and head over to mine for dinner, gift exchanging, and spending time together. My brother Tom is known for his jokes. The past few years he has given Cory a selection of funny shirts. The one last year, "Nothing For You Whore!" with Santa pointing a finger. Cory just finds Tom hilarious. I love my family because we always have fun. Whether we are re gifting rocks (where it all started with my grandpa and aunt and mom) or giving Tom a mysterious Twinkie, or getting scratch off tickets from Santa every year and no one will fess up to who is Santa. This year, I wanted to get Tom back so I made Cory, much to his dislike, wear the shirt he got last year. My family thought it was hilarious! And though we didn't up Tom this year, the thing Tom did this year is so bad I cannot even post it on here, it was a fun thing to do. Probably not the outfit Cory had planned to wear to propose to me in though! In my defense how was I suppose to know? But hey, it makes for the perfect memory!
THE PROPOSAL! Finally. About time geez!
So we pass out all the gifts and open them one at a time so everyone can see what each other got. I was about to open my last gift when another open appeared in the wrapping paper we had wrapped all our gifts in. I looked at Cory and he told me he brought a gift from home for me to open. I was confused but hey another gift woohoo. So I open it and my nephew Jarod keeps playing with me and trying to help unwrap it. I open it up and it is a wooden block that says LOVE YOU MORE on it. I was all happy because it meant something but wondering at the same time why he was having me open this at my parents when I look up and he is getting down on one knee (in the bad santa shirt poor guy) with a ring box and he asks me to marry him. I said yes, of course, we shared some tears, and everyone clapped! He put the ring (very over sized haha) on me and then I was explained the story about how he had asked my father to lunch and asked him for his blessing and that my mom knew because she had seen the text from Cory. I was shocked my mom kept the secret! I am glad she did though, I was completely shocked and it made the whole thing perfect. What did I say about Cory earlier, he does everything old school...and I love it.
We have not picked out a date! People keep asking! Most likely if you are reading I will let you know :) Last night I was telling him who I planned for my maid of honor and who I wanted to stand up with me, etc. I joked with him that I bet he wished he hadn't asked me! I know he is glad that he did.
And there it is! Nothing extravagant but perfect in my eyes!
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Sunday, November 2, 2014
Two Indy Marathons, one injury, one goal, and friends for a lifetime.
I would say after yesterday I am completely recovered, but if that were true, my butt would have been at the starting line of Rattlesnake this morning. Or would it? Maybe I have learned from this past year, maybe I am more careful, maybe I decided I liked the way yesterday felt too much to go through this year again...
I had one of the slowest healing injuries. Even after a year I still feel pain after a long hard run, which is sadly normal. I hope it isn't always going to be the case, but it is a reminder to take it easy and not overdo it. A reminder we all know I need because my stubborn ass wants to keep showing up at every race I can!
Last year I signed up for the Indianapolis Marathon with many other SWRC members. It was our fall goal race and everyone I knew was either going to do the half or the full. I was put on crutches early October and told not to run the race. I had hoped to be off crutches by the race and help man the tent and cheer my fellow runners on. This was not the case. So I went anyway, crutches and all. Our hotel was about a half mile away from packet pick up and a few blocks from the start line. After crutching back from packet pick up Friday night I decided to take a cab to the start line the next morning. Granted it was dark and I was alone, I took a cab 2 blocks. 2 blocks. I am the person that gets extremely mad when I see someone drive up to their mailbox to get their mail or park at the door of a store and run in so they don't have to walk. I get extremely annoyed because seriously, how lazy can you be. Well anyway I cabbed it and if anyone wants to say anything I still have the crutches, you are more than welcome to borrow them for a day!!
But everyone knows about my injury, this post is about my come back. I had a moment that I could finally tell my hip who was boss, and it was this weekend! This Indy Marathon! My friends played a huge part in both weekends in Indy, the one I crutched, the one I ran. If any of my friends who do not run ever wonder why I love running so much, this is the time you should read what I write :)
So a year ago I was in pretty good spirits for me. I was the crazy runner. I ran every single race that came my way and I ran them fast. I remember the first race Cory came to and watched. After it he told me he did not realize I was a good runner! Haha he meant that in the best way! I finished first female overall and he was impressed, hell I was impressed! That rarely happens. But I love to race and if you race all area races you are bound to win one! I did pretty good for myself and I was proud of myself. So when a race I trained and planned on racing comes by and I can't do it, well once again I was impressed with myself because I was ok with it! My friends made me feel like I was racing with them. Marc Mills made me my own personal bib and even framed it! I was included in all the pics and they made me forget I wasn't racing.
This year I was determined to run Indy! I say run because I had no clue what shape I would be in for it, but damnit, I would show up at the start and cross the finish line. Throughout the year I had a few set backs and thought I would not be going, but as the date got closer I knew I would make it.
I was in all out freak out mode a week before. Everyone around me was sick, not really but I felt like it. I was going to get sick and not be able to go. I would be stuck at home again, defeated by Indy again. My friends, family, Cory, coworkers...they all put up with freak out Niki. I was a bit crazy haha. They kept telling me I was a healthy person and I would be fine but I wouldn't listen. But the day came to leave and I was ok. I was ready. One more obstacle I didn't plan for, the weather.
A week before the race we ran on a Saturday and it was unseasonably hot. This was not the case for the race but I am not sure what was forecasted was any better. Race time start had it at 30 degrees and 20 mph winds, the half marathoners would be running into the wind for the first 9 miles. I mean, good that the last 4 miles are with the wind and all, if you make it through the first 9! The marathoners had it worse! The night before it was even snowing. Snowing on Halloween with 30 mph winds, very funny mother nature.
We had all planned to wear shorts but brought everything. I brought everything and then some. I ended up wearing Sarah Dowd's capris though haha. We head out to the race and it is cold. Damn cold. Michele and I head over to the start line. My mood was kind of blah. I made it here but I was miserable. I was cold, uncomfortable, and just wanted it to be over. Not the Indy I had imagined for the past year. I joked with Michele that I shouldn't have been standing with her, she is much faster and I didn't want to start too fast.
After what seemed like forever, we finally start. I would like to say within a mile I warmed up, but that never happened. I was cold the entire time. I have lost all ability to pace myself. I planned to start off closer to 9 and then get faster as I went and that did not happen. I started off the first mile a little slower than 8, maybe 8:10. My next two miles were both at 8. Michele surprised me at mile 3 and told me she had "caught up" with me. I knew I was going too fast, but I felt ok. I also knew it was early and probably wouldn't last. I decided to just say screw it and stay at 8, and see how it went. Miles went by and I was actually going right with the 3:30 marathon pace group, which would put me at 1:45 for the half if i could keep up. At mile 7 the half and full split and go different directions, so the pace group I was following went bye bye. The guy at the split was not as cool as Mermaid Tricia, as a matter of fact he kindly told us at the split we would start running into more wind! Thanks a lot man! Not really. I should probably tell all my non running friends now, it is not kind to EVER say "you are almost there!" You are never almost there in a race. Not even if the finish line is around the corner. It is still FOREVER AND EVER far away so just don't ever say it!
Anyway it went through my head that if I could keep it up through 10, I would be way ahead of my goal and I could even walk! 10 came and I was definitely tired but I didn't want to walk, so I thought maybe at 11. Around 11.5 I thought I may throw up but I kept going. At 12 I wanted to and at 12.5 we turned right back into the wind and I hated every single part of that moment, but I kept running. I crossed the finish line and looked at my watch, I had actually sped up for the second half, and I was only a little over 2 minutes off my PR. I couldn't believe it. I had come so far from last year when I stood with my crutches on the sideline and watched everyone come in and finish.
For the second time in my racing life I cried. The first time was my first half marathon at Mahomet. Cory and my parents were so proud of me I just couldn't help it! I have done 2 marathons and an Olympic TRI since and didn't feel it but I felt it when I finished Indy. This was the goal I had all year, and it was mine! Time didn't matter, it was just the cherry on the top! I made it to Indy, I made it to the start, and I crossed the finish line!
My friends put up with me and stood by me when I was at my worst. I was not very easy to deal with! Ask Aldo when I went off on him because he was running fast and my hip hurt, ask Amber when I would constantly ask her for advice, or Valeria when I asked her how she dealt with not training with the group for a year. Ask my coworkers when I freaked out about getting sick, my mother when I called with constant worry, or Cory, who puts up with me daily, with it all, and still smiles when I tell him it ended up better than I could ever imagined, because he knew all along it would....
Thanks everyone, I may have made my goal, but I wouldn't have, I couldn't have, without you all. I know it was just a half, but it was my half, my goal, and it meant the world to me...
I had one of the slowest healing injuries. Even after a year I still feel pain after a long hard run, which is sadly normal. I hope it isn't always going to be the case, but it is a reminder to take it easy and not overdo it. A reminder we all know I need because my stubborn ass wants to keep showing up at every race I can!
Last year I signed up for the Indianapolis Marathon with many other SWRC members. It was our fall goal race and everyone I knew was either going to do the half or the full. I was put on crutches early October and told not to run the race. I had hoped to be off crutches by the race and help man the tent and cheer my fellow runners on. This was not the case. So I went anyway, crutches and all. Our hotel was about a half mile away from packet pick up and a few blocks from the start line. After crutching back from packet pick up Friday night I decided to take a cab to the start line the next morning. Granted it was dark and I was alone, I took a cab 2 blocks. 2 blocks. I am the person that gets extremely mad when I see someone drive up to their mailbox to get their mail or park at the door of a store and run in so they don't have to walk. I get extremely annoyed because seriously, how lazy can you be. Well anyway I cabbed it and if anyone wants to say anything I still have the crutches, you are more than welcome to borrow them for a day!!
But everyone knows about my injury, this post is about my come back. I had a moment that I could finally tell my hip who was boss, and it was this weekend! This Indy Marathon! My friends played a huge part in both weekends in Indy, the one I crutched, the one I ran. If any of my friends who do not run ever wonder why I love running so much, this is the time you should read what I write :)
So a year ago I was in pretty good spirits for me. I was the crazy runner. I ran every single race that came my way and I ran them fast. I remember the first race Cory came to and watched. After it he told me he did not realize I was a good runner! Haha he meant that in the best way! I finished first female overall and he was impressed, hell I was impressed! That rarely happens. But I love to race and if you race all area races you are bound to win one! I did pretty good for myself and I was proud of myself. So when a race I trained and planned on racing comes by and I can't do it, well once again I was impressed with myself because I was ok with it! My friends made me feel like I was racing with them. Marc Mills made me my own personal bib and even framed it! I was included in all the pics and they made me forget I wasn't racing.
This year I was determined to run Indy! I say run because I had no clue what shape I would be in for it, but damnit, I would show up at the start and cross the finish line. Throughout the year I had a few set backs and thought I would not be going, but as the date got closer I knew I would make it.
I was in all out freak out mode a week before. Everyone around me was sick, not really but I felt like it. I was going to get sick and not be able to go. I would be stuck at home again, defeated by Indy again. My friends, family, Cory, coworkers...they all put up with freak out Niki. I was a bit crazy haha. They kept telling me I was a healthy person and I would be fine but I wouldn't listen. But the day came to leave and I was ok. I was ready. One more obstacle I didn't plan for, the weather.
A week before the race we ran on a Saturday and it was unseasonably hot. This was not the case for the race but I am not sure what was forecasted was any better. Race time start had it at 30 degrees and 20 mph winds, the half marathoners would be running into the wind for the first 9 miles. I mean, good that the last 4 miles are with the wind and all, if you make it through the first 9! The marathoners had it worse! The night before it was even snowing. Snowing on Halloween with 30 mph winds, very funny mother nature.
We had all planned to wear shorts but brought everything. I brought everything and then some. I ended up wearing Sarah Dowd's capris though haha. We head out to the race and it is cold. Damn cold. Michele and I head over to the start line. My mood was kind of blah. I made it here but I was miserable. I was cold, uncomfortable, and just wanted it to be over. Not the Indy I had imagined for the past year. I joked with Michele that I shouldn't have been standing with her, she is much faster and I didn't want to start too fast.
After what seemed like forever, we finally start. I would like to say within a mile I warmed up, but that never happened. I was cold the entire time. I have lost all ability to pace myself. I planned to start off closer to 9 and then get faster as I went and that did not happen. I started off the first mile a little slower than 8, maybe 8:10. My next two miles were both at 8. Michele surprised me at mile 3 and told me she had "caught up" with me. I knew I was going too fast, but I felt ok. I also knew it was early and probably wouldn't last. I decided to just say screw it and stay at 8, and see how it went. Miles went by and I was actually going right with the 3:30 marathon pace group, which would put me at 1:45 for the half if i could keep up. At mile 7 the half and full split and go different directions, so the pace group I was following went bye bye. The guy at the split was not as cool as Mermaid Tricia, as a matter of fact he kindly told us at the split we would start running into more wind! Thanks a lot man! Not really. I should probably tell all my non running friends now, it is not kind to EVER say "you are almost there!" You are never almost there in a race. Not even if the finish line is around the corner. It is still FOREVER AND EVER far away so just don't ever say it!
Anyway it went through my head that if I could keep it up through 10, I would be way ahead of my goal and I could even walk! 10 came and I was definitely tired but I didn't want to walk, so I thought maybe at 11. Around 11.5 I thought I may throw up but I kept going. At 12 I wanted to and at 12.5 we turned right back into the wind and I hated every single part of that moment, but I kept running. I crossed the finish line and looked at my watch, I had actually sped up for the second half, and I was only a little over 2 minutes off my PR. I couldn't believe it. I had come so far from last year when I stood with my crutches on the sideline and watched everyone come in and finish.
For the second time in my racing life I cried. The first time was my first half marathon at Mahomet. Cory and my parents were so proud of me I just couldn't help it! I have done 2 marathons and an Olympic TRI since and didn't feel it but I felt it when I finished Indy. This was the goal I had all year, and it was mine! Time didn't matter, it was just the cherry on the top! I made it to Indy, I made it to the start, and I crossed the finish line!
My friends put up with me and stood by me when I was at my worst. I was not very easy to deal with! Ask Aldo when I went off on him because he was running fast and my hip hurt, ask Amber when I would constantly ask her for advice, or Valeria when I asked her how she dealt with not training with the group for a year. Ask my coworkers when I freaked out about getting sick, my mother when I called with constant worry, or Cory, who puts up with me daily, with it all, and still smiles when I tell him it ended up better than I could ever imagined, because he knew all along it would....
Thanks everyone, I may have made my goal, but I wouldn't have, I couldn't have, without you all. I know it was just a half, but it was my half, my goal, and it meant the world to me...
Friday, October 17, 2014
The Psychology of a Run....
I had planned to do a 4-5 mile run after work. I didn't have quite the best day and the thought of sitting on my couch with my book/or a tv show, a beer, and a bag of chips sounded so much better. It was that kind of day! I forced on my running shoes and watch and told myself if I could just get in 3 miles I would be happy and then I could proceed with couch sitting and bad nutrition choices. After what seemed to be an eternity, my watch found satellite and off I went. It is funny how it all turns around...
I take off and ouch. My legs hurt, my hip is screaming why why why, and my mind just hates everything. I hate that kid because he is riding his bike and smiling and why can't I smile when I am on my bike and I hate my neighbor because she is skinny and driving her car and not running and why can't I be skinny and not running. Anyway I pass by a house that has one of those invisible fences for the dog. I do not quite understand the purpose, not sure if it is cheaper or what. All it did was scare the crap out of me my first couple runs because the dog came darting for me and no friendly dog parent was to be found so I was left screaming at the dog only to have dog pull back before shocker fence hits him. Anyway the dog and I have hit common ground. Now when I pass we pay a game to see who can get to the end of the yard first. Dog usually wins, I let him has his moment, and I move on... a little bit happier.
About this time I hit a half mile and all the pain from the beginning, which was definitely over-exaggerated, has worn off, I think how fast that half went by and how fast I will be home and ruining the 3 miles I put in. This makes me happier as well!
I turn out of the neighborhood onto busy street to head over to the other neighborhood. I know once I get there I will hit the mile mark and be a third done. I pass all the cars heading home from work and suddenly I am Kara Goucher. Oh Yah! Look at me, I am running with my perfect running form and see how fast I am! I turn off busy street into other neighborhood and hit the mile mark and I am dying. Oh my gosh I did Kara pace for .2 of a mile and I think I may die. So I slow back down while going up a monstrous hill. Ok so it is a Savoy hill which means speed bump but I am telling the story so it is monstrous! I pass a couple with a dog and they say hello, I am getting a little happier, or was it because I passed the 1.5 mark? I pass another runner, we wave, he is breathing much harder than I am, he must have thought he was Kara on that busy road too. I hit the two mile mark and start to consider going 4 miles. I am half way there and I could eat more chips. Ok 4, I will go 4!
I head back out onto busy road and car with run girl texting tries to run me over but when she looks up and freaks out I feel she won't be texting anymore while driving and I feel like superwoman, yah, If I wasn't there to almost get hit she may have actually hit someone, yah I saved someones life. Happier!! Mile 3 goes by so fast I consider going 5! Yah I will go 5, then I can eat the whole bag of chips.
Around mile 4 I am coming up on another Savoy neighborhood, yah there are a few within a few miles, and a lady won't get over and I have to run in the ditch! Woohoo trail running, you made me go off road you mean mean lady. Well I said other words but it made me happier! I hit neighborhood and it is like an obstacle course! They have removed parts of the road so I am running through barriers and having a blast! I meet a lady with a pitbull who wants to kiss me and I only stop for dogs and potty breaks on runs but the lady doesn't seem to think it is a good idea for her pit to kiss me. Bye cute doggy! Off I go.
Looking at watch I am almost at 5 miles and could run home and be right at 5, no running around the block to get exactly 5 because I end at 4.92 or anything! I can run to my door. But man, it would be so much better to tell my facebook friends I ran 6! Oh yah, 6 it is! I am a superstar! Wow, I am feeling so great! This is the best day ever! I start waving at everyone. Yah I am having the best run, look at me! I do not plan the ending as well as if I did 5 so, what the hell, I will just make it an even 10k!
Walking in my door and shutting off my watch I look over at the couch, the couch that looked so great less than 50 minutes ago. It doesn't look as good now. I do not really want chips anymore but some Gatorade or chocolate milk sounds good! A shower sounds good too! Oh, there's Cory, oh he didn't have a good day, I think he should go for a run, don't you???
I take off and ouch. My legs hurt, my hip is screaming why why why, and my mind just hates everything. I hate that kid because he is riding his bike and smiling and why can't I smile when I am on my bike and I hate my neighbor because she is skinny and driving her car and not running and why can't I be skinny and not running. Anyway I pass by a house that has one of those invisible fences for the dog. I do not quite understand the purpose, not sure if it is cheaper or what. All it did was scare the crap out of me my first couple runs because the dog came darting for me and no friendly dog parent was to be found so I was left screaming at the dog only to have dog pull back before shocker fence hits him. Anyway the dog and I have hit common ground. Now when I pass we pay a game to see who can get to the end of the yard first. Dog usually wins, I let him has his moment, and I move on... a little bit happier.
About this time I hit a half mile and all the pain from the beginning, which was definitely over-exaggerated, has worn off, I think how fast that half went by and how fast I will be home and ruining the 3 miles I put in. This makes me happier as well!
I turn out of the neighborhood onto busy street to head over to the other neighborhood. I know once I get there I will hit the mile mark and be a third done. I pass all the cars heading home from work and suddenly I am Kara Goucher. Oh Yah! Look at me, I am running with my perfect running form and see how fast I am! I turn off busy street into other neighborhood and hit the mile mark and I am dying. Oh my gosh I did Kara pace for .2 of a mile and I think I may die. So I slow back down while going up a monstrous hill. Ok so it is a Savoy hill which means speed bump but I am telling the story so it is monstrous! I pass a couple with a dog and they say hello, I am getting a little happier, or was it because I passed the 1.5 mark? I pass another runner, we wave, he is breathing much harder than I am, he must have thought he was Kara on that busy road too. I hit the two mile mark and start to consider going 4 miles. I am half way there and I could eat more chips. Ok 4, I will go 4!
I head back out onto busy road and car with run girl texting tries to run me over but when she looks up and freaks out I feel she won't be texting anymore while driving and I feel like superwoman, yah, If I wasn't there to almost get hit she may have actually hit someone, yah I saved someones life. Happier!! Mile 3 goes by so fast I consider going 5! Yah I will go 5, then I can eat the whole bag of chips.
Around mile 4 I am coming up on another Savoy neighborhood, yah there are a few within a few miles, and a lady won't get over and I have to run in the ditch! Woohoo trail running, you made me go off road you mean mean lady. Well I said other words but it made me happier! I hit neighborhood and it is like an obstacle course! They have removed parts of the road so I am running through barriers and having a blast! I meet a lady with a pitbull who wants to kiss me and I only stop for dogs and potty breaks on runs but the lady doesn't seem to think it is a good idea for her pit to kiss me. Bye cute doggy! Off I go.
Looking at watch I am almost at 5 miles and could run home and be right at 5, no running around the block to get exactly 5 because I end at 4.92 or anything! I can run to my door. But man, it would be so much better to tell my facebook friends I ran 6! Oh yah, 6 it is! I am a superstar! Wow, I am feeling so great! This is the best day ever! I start waving at everyone. Yah I am having the best run, look at me! I do not plan the ending as well as if I did 5 so, what the hell, I will just make it an even 10k!
Walking in my door and shutting off my watch I look over at the couch, the couch that looked so great less than 50 minutes ago. It doesn't look as good now. I do not really want chips anymore but some Gatorade or chocolate milk sounds good! A shower sounds good too! Oh, there's Cory, oh he didn't have a good day, I think he should go for a run, don't you???
Monday, September 22, 2014
last place!
My friends and I are use to taking home age awards at races. Most of us have enough medals to host our own race and enough trophies to show off at work and make our coworkers think we are pretty awesome! Nothing beats standing at the water cooler telling your coworkers that you took first place in your age group at the last local 5k! What is a 5k they may ask? You smile and give them the whole race play for play down to every sweat particle and second you took off your PR!
Yah we are pretty competitive and pretty damn good! Around here! We know if we head to the Boston Marathon or even run the local IL Marathon there is very little chance we will place. It doesn't matter because we take all the areas races anyway! Those big races just level us out and let us know there is always someone out there better. Extreme talent for us to appreciate and strive harder to achieve!
With the area races I got to the point where I wasn't happy unless I got first place in my age group. I could race and get my PR by several seconds but get second in my age group and I still wasn't happy. I did my absolute best and I was still disappointed! You can imagine my surprise last week when I finished my first Olympic Triathlon and found out I was dead last in my age group! I was crushed!
I started doing triathlons this year with the understanding it was for fun! I wasn't going to place, so I would try something new and have fun with it! My first tri I was pretty happy and I actually placed in my age group! I have to admit this was not the best thing for me! The first thought that entered my mind was maybe I was better than I thought! I even challenged my friend that I would beat her at a tri! She did an ironman last year! I was insane and a little cocky!
My next tri I still finished fourth in my age and was still pretty happy! The swim was longer so I felt good about my place. Then, I do a OLY and I finish! I felt great about it! I come home with a super good attitude! Then I look at results and see I am last and suddenly all my feelings change. I suck, I am horrible, should I even do this anymore??
I have raced a tri since and did better in my age but I didn't feel better overall. I felt better in the tri I came in last at. So..... Why do I compare myself to others? Why do we all? If we just ran for ourselves every race and didn't worry about others or age group places I wonder how much better we would be and feel about our performance.
I ran most this year on a broken hip and still felt a need to compare myself with everyone else! Why? I am doing tris for the first time and still feel the need to compare myself to others! Why??? I want to learn to just do my best and be happy with that!! Why is that so hard for me? Once I learn to accept that what I do is my best and that's all that matters I have a feeling I will be a much better athlete.
Medals and trophies tarnish and blemish, the feeling knowing you just did the best you could never fades.....
Yah we are pretty competitive and pretty damn good! Around here! We know if we head to the Boston Marathon or even run the local IL Marathon there is very little chance we will place. It doesn't matter because we take all the areas races anyway! Those big races just level us out and let us know there is always someone out there better. Extreme talent for us to appreciate and strive harder to achieve!
With the area races I got to the point where I wasn't happy unless I got first place in my age group. I could race and get my PR by several seconds but get second in my age group and I still wasn't happy. I did my absolute best and I was still disappointed! You can imagine my surprise last week when I finished my first Olympic Triathlon and found out I was dead last in my age group! I was crushed!
I started doing triathlons this year with the understanding it was for fun! I wasn't going to place, so I would try something new and have fun with it! My first tri I was pretty happy and I actually placed in my age group! I have to admit this was not the best thing for me! The first thought that entered my mind was maybe I was better than I thought! I even challenged my friend that I would beat her at a tri! She did an ironman last year! I was insane and a little cocky!
My next tri I still finished fourth in my age and was still pretty happy! The swim was longer so I felt good about my place. Then, I do a OLY and I finish! I felt great about it! I come home with a super good attitude! Then I look at results and see I am last and suddenly all my feelings change. I suck, I am horrible, should I even do this anymore??
I have raced a tri since and did better in my age but I didn't feel better overall. I felt better in the tri I came in last at. So..... Why do I compare myself to others? Why do we all? If we just ran for ourselves every race and didn't worry about others or age group places I wonder how much better we would be and feel about our performance.
I ran most this year on a broken hip and still felt a need to compare myself with everyone else! Why? I am doing tris for the first time and still feel the need to compare myself to others! Why??? I want to learn to just do my best and be happy with that!! Why is that so hard for me? Once I learn to accept that what I do is my best and that's all that matters I have a feeling I will be a much better athlete.
Medals and trophies tarnish and blemish, the feeling knowing you just did the best you could never fades.....
Thursday, August 7, 2014
The Crazies
I wonder how many people decide to start running to lose weight, feel better, exercise, etc and end up quitting later because they are bored with it, can't stand it, get injured,etc.....
I wonder how many of those same people would stay with it, love it like I do, if they had what I have?
I went on a 4 mile run tonight followed by a 6 mile bike. That's a normal night for me. I can't tell you how many times I have been called crazy. I don't mean the that b**** is crazy, crazy, I mean the why would you do that do yourself crazy. You know, why run 26.2 miles when you have a prefectly good car crazy! Simple answer? I like it! And I can so I will. I'll post about it later and make more people think I am crazy and won't care one bit! Maybe I am crazy! I love it!
I started back running 5 years ago. What started as a simple race has become a lifestyle. Not sure I could say that last sentence if it wasn't for the crazies. Yah the crazies! More than proud to be a part of that group! Heck my crazy need to organize runs and such helped to make that group! We all share one thing in common, we love to run. We are fast, slow, distance runners, sprinters, triathletes, friends. We don't have a membership fee, we don't have expectations (cough Valeria cough) we don't really care about anything except having fun and running.
We started off just getting to know each other at races and speed work. We noticed a common trend among us all and decided to hang out one night and not run and well the rest is history. So why crazy? Aren't we like everyone else? I think not. Some of us race 30+ races a year. Some of us log 175+ miles a week, some of us sign up for an Ironman after doing one mini tri, some of us follow up our first triathlon a week later with our first ultra, some of us do 4 or more sports a week, some of us do crazy 5k obstacle races, and some of us run on injuries for months just to stay in the game.
I think the most impressive thing about the crazies is we all share the joys, triumphs, disappointments, and feelings of each person in our group. We are there for one another and we make this tough thing we all love to do so much more meaningful and worth it! I think everyone should have a crazies group in their life.
But remember, you will never be as good at being crazy as us. Don't try. We will win every time.
There! Short and sweet! Don't expect this again..... :)
I wonder how many of those same people would stay with it, love it like I do, if they had what I have?
I went on a 4 mile run tonight followed by a 6 mile bike. That's a normal night for me. I can't tell you how many times I have been called crazy. I don't mean the that b**** is crazy, crazy, I mean the why would you do that do yourself crazy. You know, why run 26.2 miles when you have a prefectly good car crazy! Simple answer? I like it! And I can so I will. I'll post about it later and make more people think I am crazy and won't care one bit! Maybe I am crazy! I love it!
I started back running 5 years ago. What started as a simple race has become a lifestyle. Not sure I could say that last sentence if it wasn't for the crazies. Yah the crazies! More than proud to be a part of that group! Heck my crazy need to organize runs and such helped to make that group! We all share one thing in common, we love to run. We are fast, slow, distance runners, sprinters, triathletes, friends. We don't have a membership fee, we don't have expectations (cough Valeria cough) we don't really care about anything except having fun and running.
We started off just getting to know each other at races and speed work. We noticed a common trend among us all and decided to hang out one night and not run and well the rest is history. So why crazy? Aren't we like everyone else? I think not. Some of us race 30+ races a year. Some of us log 175+ miles a week, some of us sign up for an Ironman after doing one mini tri, some of us follow up our first triathlon a week later with our first ultra, some of us do 4 or more sports a week, some of us do crazy 5k obstacle races, and some of us run on injuries for months just to stay in the game.
I think the most impressive thing about the crazies is we all share the joys, triumphs, disappointments, and feelings of each person in our group. We are there for one another and we make this tough thing we all love to do so much more meaningful and worth it! I think everyone should have a crazies group in their life.
But remember, you will never be as good at being crazy as us. Don't try. We will win every time.
There! Short and sweet! Don't expect this again..... :)
Thursday, July 24, 2014
I left it Far Behind for sure....
So there is a girl at karaoke every Saturday night. She likes that song from Frozen. She likes to sing that song almost every weekend. Every time she steps up to the mic we all groan a little. I had actually never heard that song, or at least I thought. It took me until one Tuesday night when a fellow Second Wind member's daughter, she may be 3 years old mind you, started belting it out that I was like ooohhh ok, I have heard it. What was so funny is I had heard it many times from obsessed karaoke girl but it took a 3 year old singing it for me to recognize it. That bad! Or that 3 year old should be heading to Nashville, who knows. But man you have to give it to that obsessed girl because she may sound bad and make everyone roll their eyes when she walks up, but she does it and she doesn't look back!
Then there is me. My family was not blessed with any musical talent what-so-ever. I have tried to play the trumpet, the guitar, the piano. I did learn them all but with the exception of the trumpet, I was not any good. The only reason I ever achieved semi good status on the trumpet was when I was in 8th grade there was this boy trumpet player that I had a crush on and I wanted to play the damn solo for once that he always got...I am not competitive at all... My lack of talent has not in anyway got in the way for my love of music. I love music! I love to sing. I use to obtain borderline groupie status chasing boys that played guitar because seriously, is there anything more sexy than a boy that has a nice voice and can play the guitar (with skinny jeans, right Laura Armstrong!!)?! However, once I was belting out some STP in the car with an ex-boyfriend and he kindly mentioned that I sucked at singing. Notice I said ex.... :)
The crazies have become obsessed with karaoke. It is a freaking blast! Especially after a few beers! I was surprised to find out some of my friends are really good! Jeff Kelly can rock the house, Michele Marcus is the next Janis Joplin, Tom G is, well Tom is good at everything, Amber Anderson can rap and then turn around and bust out some country like no other, and Paul Byron can sing about any song we throw at him! Valeria can head bang with the best of them!! Then there is me. I usually get up there and try to sing some range I can hit. I have tried The Lumineers, Train, STP (heehee screw that ex boyfriend) , and my latest attempt was at Candlebox. I was headed home from karaoke one night, still in the singing and dancing mood, and Candlebox's Far Behind started. Not only do I love that song, I thought I was singing along pretty well. In the next two weeks I practiced that song several times, and when the next karaoke night came along, I WAS READY!! Or not!
So let me get to the point of this before I go into my not so great cover of one of my favorite songs. Just because we aren't good at something does that mean we should not do it? The obsessed karaoke girl might not be that great but she is having a blast while she does it! Isn't that all the matters? I mean, if every time I walked into the pool at the Y the lifeguards got together and said, "Great, her again!" , do you think that would stop me from swimming? Hell no! As a matter of fact they probably warn the new lifeguards that I am indeed swimming out there even though it may appear to them as drowning! I guess if everyone only did the things they were good at we would not be very productive! Well Tom would be, as Letitia's previous blog stated, he just can't seem to do anything not well!
So when I get into the pool I know I am bad but I do it anyway! Same as the bike or the rowing machine! I am a pretty good runner, there are a lot of people better than me, a lot of people worse. I see people out there running that are not as good but they have a smile and are enjoying themselves. Last year I was in the best running shape of my life and I didn't enjoy it half as much as the people out there I saw coming in last or near last. They weren't great at it but they were doing it and loving it.
So back to the song, I wanted to rock that song! I get up there and know I am not great, but I practiced and I was ready. The guy off to the table next to me hears the song start and compliments me on my awesome choice. I was thinking HELL YA AWESOME CHOICE! Then I look over to the table of crazies and freeze. It starts and I always miss the first few words and I freak. A few lines into it I look over to awesome choice guy and it is clear that he thinks it is no longer awesome! I look back to crazies and Paul has about the same unsure look as I do as I struggle through the song I know I can sing. The dreadfulness finally ends and I drag myself back to the table and I tell them it sucked and they assure me it wasn't too bad! They tell me it wasn't a good karaoke song (which really means it sucked in a nice way)! Michele looks at me and says I did great with a toothy smile! She has nice teeth and she is clearly lying! I can tell, I know her better than anyone else there! haha! But 5 minutes later I turn to her and tell her to pick out my next song! Even though I suck, I will get back up there again!
So maybe next time the obsessed singer gets up to sing Let It Go we should support her more. She may not sing it well, or any other song for that matter, but she gets up there and enjoys herself and doesn't freeze and look uncomfortable like me! Maybe next time I will get up there and not care! It will probably be my best song yet!
Then there is me. My family was not blessed with any musical talent what-so-ever. I have tried to play the trumpet, the guitar, the piano. I did learn them all but with the exception of the trumpet, I was not any good. The only reason I ever achieved semi good status on the trumpet was when I was in 8th grade there was this boy trumpet player that I had a crush on and I wanted to play the damn solo for once that he always got...I am not competitive at all... My lack of talent has not in anyway got in the way for my love of music. I love music! I love to sing. I use to obtain borderline groupie status chasing boys that played guitar because seriously, is there anything more sexy than a boy that has a nice voice and can play the guitar (with skinny jeans, right Laura Armstrong!!)?! However, once I was belting out some STP in the car with an ex-boyfriend and he kindly mentioned that I sucked at singing. Notice I said ex.... :)
The crazies have become obsessed with karaoke. It is a freaking blast! Especially after a few beers! I was surprised to find out some of my friends are really good! Jeff Kelly can rock the house, Michele Marcus is the next Janis Joplin, Tom G is, well Tom is good at everything, Amber Anderson can rap and then turn around and bust out some country like no other, and Paul Byron can sing about any song we throw at him! Valeria can head bang with the best of them!! Then there is me. I usually get up there and try to sing some range I can hit. I have tried The Lumineers, Train, STP (heehee screw that ex boyfriend) , and my latest attempt was at Candlebox. I was headed home from karaoke one night, still in the singing and dancing mood, and Candlebox's Far Behind started. Not only do I love that song, I thought I was singing along pretty well. In the next two weeks I practiced that song several times, and when the next karaoke night came along, I WAS READY!! Or not!
So let me get to the point of this before I go into my not so great cover of one of my favorite songs. Just because we aren't good at something does that mean we should not do it? The obsessed karaoke girl might not be that great but she is having a blast while she does it! Isn't that all the matters? I mean, if every time I walked into the pool at the Y the lifeguards got together and said, "Great, her again!" , do you think that would stop me from swimming? Hell no! As a matter of fact they probably warn the new lifeguards that I am indeed swimming out there even though it may appear to them as drowning! I guess if everyone only did the things they were good at we would not be very productive! Well Tom would be, as Letitia's previous blog stated, he just can't seem to do anything not well!
So when I get into the pool I know I am bad but I do it anyway! Same as the bike or the rowing machine! I am a pretty good runner, there are a lot of people better than me, a lot of people worse. I see people out there running that are not as good but they have a smile and are enjoying themselves. Last year I was in the best running shape of my life and I didn't enjoy it half as much as the people out there I saw coming in last or near last. They weren't great at it but they were doing it and loving it.
So back to the song, I wanted to rock that song! I get up there and know I am not great, but I practiced and I was ready. The guy off to the table next to me hears the song start and compliments me on my awesome choice. I was thinking HELL YA AWESOME CHOICE! Then I look over to the table of crazies and freeze. It starts and I always miss the first few words and I freak. A few lines into it I look over to awesome choice guy and it is clear that he thinks it is no longer awesome! I look back to crazies and Paul has about the same unsure look as I do as I struggle through the song I know I can sing. The dreadfulness finally ends and I drag myself back to the table and I tell them it sucked and they assure me it wasn't too bad! They tell me it wasn't a good karaoke song (which really means it sucked in a nice way)! Michele looks at me and says I did great with a toothy smile! She has nice teeth and she is clearly lying! I can tell, I know her better than anyone else there! haha! But 5 minutes later I turn to her and tell her to pick out my next song! Even though I suck, I will get back up there again!
So maybe next time the obsessed singer gets up to sing Let It Go we should support her more. She may not sing it well, or any other song for that matter, but she gets up there and enjoys herself and doesn't freeze and look uncomfortable like me! Maybe next time I will get up there and not care! It will probably be my best song yet!
Friday, May 2, 2014
Fartlek!
So for those of you getting excited right now the title of this has nothing to do with what you are about to read. As I wrote this tonight I could not think of a title since it is a jumbled mess of my thoughts and frustrations. I figured Fartlek is the perfect title because basically unless you are a runner, you do not understand what fartlek is and you shouldn't! Why I decided to blog tonight is related to that because I had a non runner - my boyfriend / best friend - say such a non runner comment to me tonight it really upset me, because, well, he doesn't understand...
Most of the people reading this are my runner friends! My non running friends have probably given up on me because all I do is run. One of my friends once asked me if there is anything I do that is not about running. I got to thinking about it and came to the conclusion that there wasn't. It is not that I just run 5 to 6 days a week and that I spend most of my weekends with my running friends. It's that also most of my vacations or getaways are running events, my spending money is spent on running gear, races, etc. My diet is plotted around if I have a race or long run and what I should eat, the shoes I wear on my feet are determined on a comfort factor if I have a race coming up. Even the clothes I wear when I am not at work are showing off my latest race or Brooks/Nike sponsored shirt. I make sure I get up every hour at work and walk around so I am not stiff or sitting too long so I can prevent injuries and stay healthy for running. So yah. Everything is about running. Now I even cross train so I can continue to run. It is exhausting for a non runner to be around me, I get it. I praise Cory (boyfriend) for all he does for me to help me! He buys me random running gear, peals my oranges, listens to me cry and moan because I have been in and out of this hip injury for the past 8 months. He has been a saint. But that doesn't mean he gets it...
It all started tonight when I came home from the marathon wrap up event for the training program. Another race down where what I had planned to do was changed due to my stupid hip. Side note here, for as much trouble as this damn hip is giving me could I at least have some curvy hips or a butt or something. Nope it just has to hurt and not even look good hurting. Anyway back to the point, so I was feeling sorry for myself. All my friends are trying to narrow down their races because they have too many and I am like, damn I hope I can run that TRI in 2 weeks I paid too much for that I am not sure I can even do or should do now. So I do such a Niki thing and tell Cory, "It feels like I am never going to be able to run again." ***Tears here and Cory thinking oh god not again*** You know, I have a hip stress fracture the world is ENDING. Well he says the thing most non runners would say, "Niki, calm down, you only had to take off 6 months!" He was trying to help but I'm like.....6 MONTHS! Do you know how long a few days is to a runner let alone 6 MONTHS! Tell a runner it is time to taper and they are sad, be a runner and get a cold and have to take 4 days to a week off and you think you are going to be SO FAT and lose all your speed. Tell a runner (my turn) that you have to sit out 6 months and that said runner breaks down. It is hard.
Ok so why am I bringing this up yet again. Everyone thought I was healed and ready to go. I was! I had completed my recovery and was back at it as the doctor recommended and feeling good and then one day BAM it hurt again. Coincidence that it was right before the IL marathon events, probably not but it felt like a slap!
A few people have said to me, yah well you came back pretty strong. You know those terms "the good die young" and "nice guys finish last"??? I wish I would have just continued to race my heart out but no, actually this time I followed the doctors orders. I was a good patient as they call them. I admit, the hip injury, all my fault. You are bound to get injured running 6 days a week and 4 to 5 races a month and long runs and speed works with no cross training and no stretching/strength. The problem is that when you are on fire, you do not care. I had two good years. In high school I could care less about running and it showed, I did not do well. The past two years I worked my ass off and I was hitting PR after PR and having a great time. Many times I had people tell me I need to chill out and calm down but I was doing well and I was going to keep with it. I can warn my friends now but at the same time I understand, haha, I mean I envy them and pray they can keep it up. But anyways I did what the doctor said and when I came back to running I did the silly back to running program were you start out running 30 seconds walking 4 minutes 30 seconds on and off for 30 minutes. I even had some of my great friends do it with me! yah I did all that and everything else he suggested and it went well. The only thing I did wrong was run a few legs at River to River and he was more saying NO ONE should run like that because you run/sit/sun/sit and that is bad. I can tell you it was not one event that broke my hip and it was not that one event that would ruin all I worked for.
Anyway... after explaining all this to Cory tonight I think he still probably did not understand but he does really care. He has put up with me at my worst and always kept a smile so asking him to understand my obsession with running when he isn't a runner is unfair. I guess I could compare it to asking a smoker to take a few months off smoking cold turkey but I do not think non runners see it that way. It is an addiction. Too much of anything can hurt you, obviously, I ran on a damn broken hip for half a year haha and just kept telling myself it would go away. So here I am again. Sitting on the sidelines. I get to swim tomorrow! That would normally make me happy but right now I am just blah. I feel like I keep taking time off just to come back for a bit and then take more time off. GRRR. Why is something so good for you being so bad to me. Ok ok. I will stop. Because by November I plan to come back and tell all you had much fun Michele had at our Oak Run TRI and how we kicked Indy's butt so I guess if it means I can do those goal races I will once again sit out and be the cheerleader! I am excited to be back at it for those events so I will let myself heal...again. And to all the Crazy Runners, thanks, without you all I would have gone insane. I am sure Cory thanks you all too :)
But...In the meantime, who needs me to hold their bag? :)
Most of the people reading this are my runner friends! My non running friends have probably given up on me because all I do is run. One of my friends once asked me if there is anything I do that is not about running. I got to thinking about it and came to the conclusion that there wasn't. It is not that I just run 5 to 6 days a week and that I spend most of my weekends with my running friends. It's that also most of my vacations or getaways are running events, my spending money is spent on running gear, races, etc. My diet is plotted around if I have a race or long run and what I should eat, the shoes I wear on my feet are determined on a comfort factor if I have a race coming up. Even the clothes I wear when I am not at work are showing off my latest race or Brooks/Nike sponsored shirt. I make sure I get up every hour at work and walk around so I am not stiff or sitting too long so I can prevent injuries and stay healthy for running. So yah. Everything is about running. Now I even cross train so I can continue to run. It is exhausting for a non runner to be around me, I get it. I praise Cory (boyfriend) for all he does for me to help me! He buys me random running gear, peals my oranges, listens to me cry and moan because I have been in and out of this hip injury for the past 8 months. He has been a saint. But that doesn't mean he gets it...
It all started tonight when I came home from the marathon wrap up event for the training program. Another race down where what I had planned to do was changed due to my stupid hip. Side note here, for as much trouble as this damn hip is giving me could I at least have some curvy hips or a butt or something. Nope it just has to hurt and not even look good hurting. Anyway back to the point, so I was feeling sorry for myself. All my friends are trying to narrow down their races because they have too many and I am like, damn I hope I can run that TRI in 2 weeks I paid too much for that I am not sure I can even do or should do now. So I do such a Niki thing and tell Cory, "It feels like I am never going to be able to run again." ***Tears here and Cory thinking oh god not again*** You know, I have a hip stress fracture the world is ENDING. Well he says the thing most non runners would say, "Niki, calm down, you only had to take off 6 months!" He was trying to help but I'm like.....6 MONTHS! Do you know how long a few days is to a runner let alone 6 MONTHS! Tell a runner it is time to taper and they are sad, be a runner and get a cold and have to take 4 days to a week off and you think you are going to be SO FAT and lose all your speed. Tell a runner (my turn) that you have to sit out 6 months and that said runner breaks down. It is hard.
Ok so why am I bringing this up yet again. Everyone thought I was healed and ready to go. I was! I had completed my recovery and was back at it as the doctor recommended and feeling good and then one day BAM it hurt again. Coincidence that it was right before the IL marathon events, probably not but it felt like a slap!
A few people have said to me, yah well you came back pretty strong. You know those terms "the good die young" and "nice guys finish last"??? I wish I would have just continued to race my heart out but no, actually this time I followed the doctors orders. I was a good patient as they call them. I admit, the hip injury, all my fault. You are bound to get injured running 6 days a week and 4 to 5 races a month and long runs and speed works with no cross training and no stretching/strength. The problem is that when you are on fire, you do not care. I had two good years. In high school I could care less about running and it showed, I did not do well. The past two years I worked my ass off and I was hitting PR after PR and having a great time. Many times I had people tell me I need to chill out and calm down but I was doing well and I was going to keep with it. I can warn my friends now but at the same time I understand, haha, I mean I envy them and pray they can keep it up. But anyways I did what the doctor said and when I came back to running I did the silly back to running program were you start out running 30 seconds walking 4 minutes 30 seconds on and off for 30 minutes. I even had some of my great friends do it with me! yah I did all that and everything else he suggested and it went well. The only thing I did wrong was run a few legs at River to River and he was more saying NO ONE should run like that because you run/sit/sun/sit and that is bad. I can tell you it was not one event that broke my hip and it was not that one event that would ruin all I worked for.
Anyway... after explaining all this to Cory tonight I think he still probably did not understand but he does really care. He has put up with me at my worst and always kept a smile so asking him to understand my obsession with running when he isn't a runner is unfair. I guess I could compare it to asking a smoker to take a few months off smoking cold turkey but I do not think non runners see it that way. It is an addiction. Too much of anything can hurt you, obviously, I ran on a damn broken hip for half a year haha and just kept telling myself it would go away. So here I am again. Sitting on the sidelines. I get to swim tomorrow! That would normally make me happy but right now I am just blah. I feel like I keep taking time off just to come back for a bit and then take more time off. GRRR. Why is something so good for you being so bad to me. Ok ok. I will stop. Because by November I plan to come back and tell all you had much fun Michele had at our Oak Run TRI and how we kicked Indy's butt so I guess if it means I can do those goal races I will once again sit out and be the cheerleader! I am excited to be back at it for those events so I will let myself heal...again. And to all the Crazy Runners, thanks, without you all I would have gone insane. I am sure Cory thanks you all too :)
But...In the meantime, who needs me to hold their bag? :)
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Thing I haven't learned while swimming....
I thought it was a great idea when the knowledge of a swim class came along. 8 weeks and I would be a pro! I would be winning my age group in all the TRI's I participate in right? Haha ha ha. I grew up in a lake. No jokes here about my last name being Lake either haha. My parents shared a lot on Lake Oak Run with my dad's twin brother. We spent our weekends growing up in that lake. I was in swimming lessons before I could walk. I was obsessed with water asking my parents to wake me up on long trips every time we passed a lake, pool, water park, etc. Every chance I got I was swimming! You would think somewhere along the way I would have actually learned some technique, some speed, something. Nope. I learned how to dive in, swim underneath, do somersaults, and have fun! This class my friends, has been a challenge.
Ok so since I do not have enough space or time to try to tell you all that I have been taught, because if you did not know already swimming requires that you think of 200 things all at once and still stay alive, I will give you a list of what I know!
1. No matter if you think you have perfected the art of keeping your head down while swimming, it is not far enough. They tell you to look at the floor of the pool, that's wrong, you actually need to look under yourself at the wall you are swimming away from, at least that's what I think will be required for them to stop yelling at me to get my head down.
2. King Kong must be an excellent swimmer. I believe that is what you must look like while moving your arms in the water. At least that is what we practice before.
3. No matter what you think you look like while you are swimming, you are lying to yourself. Have someone video tape you. It is a real comedy!
4. I know there is a correct way to breathe. I have tried to perfect that many times and decided it is better to survive and not drink the entire pool.
5. It is impossible to try to think about moving your arms correctly, breathing, keeping your head down, moving your legs and feet correctly, and having your hands do that arch thingy all that the same time. There is a reason that they have the saying, "Don't walk and chew gum at the same time!"
6. When learning to do flip turns it is extremely important that you do 2 things, these things are much more important than hitting the wall with your body believe me! 1. Breath out of your nose when turning. DO IT! It really hurts if you do not. 2. Make sure your goggles are tight!
7. NEVER EVER and I mean this, water run before you swim. Your calves will cramp like you have never ever felt before and you will likely be in the deep end looking like a beached whale trying to get to the wall or shallow end.
8. It really does help to get the water out of your ears if you hop on the opposite foot of the ear you are shaking to get water out of! This I have been told only works poolside! So go ahead and look like a freak, your ears will thank you later!
so ok ok, yes I like to joke and in all seriousness this class has taught me one very valuable lesson: I will never perfect swimming! I am totally ok with this! I can go out, swim what I need to, how I want to do it, and have fun with it. I don't care if I look stupid, I don't care if I can go faster by doing things differently! I know I feel comfortable with the way I do it and that is all that matters! This was all for fun anyway right? Plus I have met some awesome people in the class and had a lot of fun, well, when I wasn't practicing drills haha!
Running is so easy. I know right about now people are like WTF Niki. What I mean by this is, I put on shoes, the necessary clothing, sometimes a watch and water bottle, and hit the door running. Yes if I am doing speed work or a long run it is painful and hard and some of my friends do some amazing races! What I mean is I can run without thinking too much, I can chat while I run. Swimming is a total monster when it comes to doing it right! Heck maybe there is a ton of awesome techniques to running I could perfect but if there is, shut up I don't want to know!
All I have to say for all the swimmers out there that have the patience and time to learn to do it correctly, I admire you! In the meantime I will be here in the lanes with you swimming funky, with my head too high, breathing wrong, and my technique will be off, but I will get to the same place all you are going...eventually, and I will LOVE IT!
Ok so since I do not have enough space or time to try to tell you all that I have been taught, because if you did not know already swimming requires that you think of 200 things all at once and still stay alive, I will give you a list of what I know!
1. No matter if you think you have perfected the art of keeping your head down while swimming, it is not far enough. They tell you to look at the floor of the pool, that's wrong, you actually need to look under yourself at the wall you are swimming away from, at least that's what I think will be required for them to stop yelling at me to get my head down.
2. King Kong must be an excellent swimmer. I believe that is what you must look like while moving your arms in the water. At least that is what we practice before.
3. No matter what you think you look like while you are swimming, you are lying to yourself. Have someone video tape you. It is a real comedy!
4. I know there is a correct way to breathe. I have tried to perfect that many times and decided it is better to survive and not drink the entire pool.
5. It is impossible to try to think about moving your arms correctly, breathing, keeping your head down, moving your legs and feet correctly, and having your hands do that arch thingy all that the same time. There is a reason that they have the saying, "Don't walk and chew gum at the same time!"
6. When learning to do flip turns it is extremely important that you do 2 things, these things are much more important than hitting the wall with your body believe me! 1. Breath out of your nose when turning. DO IT! It really hurts if you do not. 2. Make sure your goggles are tight!
7. NEVER EVER and I mean this, water run before you swim. Your calves will cramp like you have never ever felt before and you will likely be in the deep end looking like a beached whale trying to get to the wall or shallow end.
8. It really does help to get the water out of your ears if you hop on the opposite foot of the ear you are shaking to get water out of! This I have been told only works poolside! So go ahead and look like a freak, your ears will thank you later!
so ok ok, yes I like to joke and in all seriousness this class has taught me one very valuable lesson: I will never perfect swimming! I am totally ok with this! I can go out, swim what I need to, how I want to do it, and have fun with it. I don't care if I look stupid, I don't care if I can go faster by doing things differently! I know I feel comfortable with the way I do it and that is all that matters! This was all for fun anyway right? Plus I have met some awesome people in the class and had a lot of fun, well, when I wasn't practicing drills haha!
Running is so easy. I know right about now people are like WTF Niki. What I mean by this is, I put on shoes, the necessary clothing, sometimes a watch and water bottle, and hit the door running. Yes if I am doing speed work or a long run it is painful and hard and some of my friends do some amazing races! What I mean is I can run without thinking too much, I can chat while I run. Swimming is a total monster when it comes to doing it right! Heck maybe there is a ton of awesome techniques to running I could perfect but if there is, shut up I don't want to know!
All I have to say for all the swimmers out there that have the patience and time to learn to do it correctly, I admire you! In the meantime I will be here in the lanes with you swimming funky, with my head too high, breathing wrong, and my technique will be off, but I will get to the same place all you are going...eventually, and I will LOVE IT!
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
That is the worst thing and the best thing that has ever happened to me! What?
Blog #2. Which means this should be easier right? Well this will be happier so at least there is that! To update you all from my last blog, I have had zero hip pain for almost 3 weeks now! 3 weeks! I have ran inside on the Y's trusty treadmills, swam, biked, attended core class and spin class (devil instructors) and managed to still be pain free! Ok I am thrilled but also can you believe this, I haven't ran outside in 3 weeks. Coincidence? Probably. We will find out tonight as I am taking it to the streets to see how it goes. Can I ask you all to cross your fingers, send a little prayer my way, chant, cheer, whatever you can to get me off that awful dreadmill that I am starting to like so I must be losing my mind. HELP! QUICK! Ok there's for the update. Happy - check! Hopeful - check!
So last year at this time I was honored to be the female to receive the runner of the year award. Me? Seriously, ask my grade school basketball coach, my high school cross country coach, my band teacher - to receive that kind of an award, they would have said "Not Niki Lake, there must be a mistake?" I just realized my last name rhymes with mistake, that can't be good! Anyway, I was beyond excited and appreciative that people would actually nominate me for that! I am not the fastest by far, I do great, especially in my own happy world, but seriously, there is always someone better than yourself. So I treated this like it was some antique vase. DON'T SCRATCH IT CORY! BE CAREFUL WITH IT! It was my baby, my pride and joy! Nothing could make me happier than it EVER, right? Wrong! I was wrong. Very wrong.
So everyone knows about my hip injury. I don't know who spilled the beans, I was really trying to keep it a secret geez... Just kidding we all know how much I like to talk! Anyway, who would have thought that something so bad would be so good. Yah that made sense right? Really! Ok before said hip injury came into my life I was obsessed. Seriously obsessed. Has anyone found that runner's addict anonymous group? I could have used it. That plaque was a constant reminder! I had to race every weekend. I had to win my age group. I had to PR. Every weekend was about doing whatever it took to be able to race the best, no matter who I hurt, what plans I broke, what non-running friends I blew off. So when you are faced with the opposite, you really get an eye opener. I was bored, I couldn't run every weekend, I couldn't worry about the upcoming race, I wasn't exhausted just thinking about the races! It was great! Seriously, I missed the running, my running friends, etc., but the constant worry and trying to push myself to be the best all the time, I needed a serious break and an eye opener. It was completely my fault, I let the thought of trying to be perfect take over me and who am I kidding, I was far from perfect and getting farther away with each obsessed filled race.
So I was happy. I was cheerful. I was odd. I mean I had a smile attending races I couldn't run, cheering on competition I couldn't compete with. I was happy, relieved, excited to cheer on my friends. It was refreshing. You know what is also refreshing? CHANGE! Which I learned would have to become a part of my workout schedule. Not that, "Hey Niki, for the next few months you must cross train, stretch, and strength train or you won't be able to run." It was, "Niki, you have to do this for the rest of your life." HUH? Yep, no more 30+ races a year with a speedwork and long run packed into every weekend. No more. I can run 3 days a week and you know what, that is ok with me! I have found I love cross training! I love swimming, biking, hell I love core class and the crazy spin instructors! I have no problem with mixing it up! Especially because my doctor didn't give me permission, but told me to do TRI's!!! So here we go with a new obsession. Just kidding! Mom, Cory, it is ok, breathe please! I won't let that happen again! Cory is right now mumbling, "YAH RIGHT!" haha!
But here comes the conclusion! I was honored this year with the Spirit Award. I feel like I cheated because I was happy! I cheered on my friends! I was supportive! But I feel like I was also relieved for myself. It was like I finally was able to just let go of the notion of trying to be perfect, the best. When that was finally taken away I just felt at peace and was able to give some of that peace back! The Spirit Award meant more to me than anything in the world. Julia Williams and I had talked about this last year. Andrea Stack could win this award every year and she should. She cares more about everyone than herself!! And Murelle Plotner was a pure example of keeping up the spirit when in life you are hit with something so difficult. She made it look easy didn't she. So the fact I received this award meant more to me than any other award, especially after all the feelings I just described to you! And who to honor me with this award, my best friend. Michele Marcus is a rare gem. She is quiet, talented, energetic, kind, supportive.... I could list much more but you would all think you should warn Lee that I may have a crush haha! Seriously, I would not have made it through this year without her, without my friends! I was honored and I do not think I will ever feel more proud of myself as I did when she gave her speech and handed me that award, even if I wanted to give it back to her for all she has done! She deserved it to.
Anyway, just remember, it may be the worst thing that has ever happened to you and the best thing that has ever happened to you..... All you need is friends! Haha and you thought I was about to quote The Beatles!
So last year at this time I was honored to be the female to receive the runner of the year award. Me? Seriously, ask my grade school basketball coach, my high school cross country coach, my band teacher - to receive that kind of an award, they would have said "Not Niki Lake, there must be a mistake?" I just realized my last name rhymes with mistake, that can't be good! Anyway, I was beyond excited and appreciative that people would actually nominate me for that! I am not the fastest by far, I do great, especially in my own happy world, but seriously, there is always someone better than yourself. So I treated this like it was some antique vase. DON'T SCRATCH IT CORY! BE CAREFUL WITH IT! It was my baby, my pride and joy! Nothing could make me happier than it EVER, right? Wrong! I was wrong. Very wrong.
So everyone knows about my hip injury. I don't know who spilled the beans, I was really trying to keep it a secret geez... Just kidding we all know how much I like to talk! Anyway, who would have thought that something so bad would be so good. Yah that made sense right? Really! Ok before said hip injury came into my life I was obsessed. Seriously obsessed. Has anyone found that runner's addict anonymous group? I could have used it. That plaque was a constant reminder! I had to race every weekend. I had to win my age group. I had to PR. Every weekend was about doing whatever it took to be able to race the best, no matter who I hurt, what plans I broke, what non-running friends I blew off. So when you are faced with the opposite, you really get an eye opener. I was bored, I couldn't run every weekend, I couldn't worry about the upcoming race, I wasn't exhausted just thinking about the races! It was great! Seriously, I missed the running, my running friends, etc., but the constant worry and trying to push myself to be the best all the time, I needed a serious break and an eye opener. It was completely my fault, I let the thought of trying to be perfect take over me and who am I kidding, I was far from perfect and getting farther away with each obsessed filled race.
So I was happy. I was cheerful. I was odd. I mean I had a smile attending races I couldn't run, cheering on competition I couldn't compete with. I was happy, relieved, excited to cheer on my friends. It was refreshing. You know what is also refreshing? CHANGE! Which I learned would have to become a part of my workout schedule. Not that, "Hey Niki, for the next few months you must cross train, stretch, and strength train or you won't be able to run." It was, "Niki, you have to do this for the rest of your life." HUH? Yep, no more 30+ races a year with a speedwork and long run packed into every weekend. No more. I can run 3 days a week and you know what, that is ok with me! I have found I love cross training! I love swimming, biking, hell I love core class and the crazy spin instructors! I have no problem with mixing it up! Especially because my doctor didn't give me permission, but told me to do TRI's!!! So here we go with a new obsession. Just kidding! Mom, Cory, it is ok, breathe please! I won't let that happen again! Cory is right now mumbling, "YAH RIGHT!" haha!
But here comes the conclusion! I was honored this year with the Spirit Award. I feel like I cheated because I was happy! I cheered on my friends! I was supportive! But I feel like I was also relieved for myself. It was like I finally was able to just let go of the notion of trying to be perfect, the best. When that was finally taken away I just felt at peace and was able to give some of that peace back! The Spirit Award meant more to me than anything in the world. Julia Williams and I had talked about this last year. Andrea Stack could win this award every year and she should. She cares more about everyone than herself!! And Murelle Plotner was a pure example of keeping up the spirit when in life you are hit with something so difficult. She made it look easy didn't she. So the fact I received this award meant more to me than any other award, especially after all the feelings I just described to you! And who to honor me with this award, my best friend. Michele Marcus is a rare gem. She is quiet, talented, energetic, kind, supportive.... I could list much more but you would all think you should warn Lee that I may have a crush haha! Seriously, I would not have made it through this year without her, without my friends! I was honored and I do not think I will ever feel more proud of myself as I did when she gave her speech and handed me that award, even if I wanted to give it back to her for all she has done! She deserved it to.
Anyway, just remember, it may be the worst thing that has ever happened to you and the best thing that has ever happened to you..... All you need is friends! Haha and you thought I was about to quote The Beatles!
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Oh boy! I get to run again...
This is my first blog, so go easy on me. This will not be heart warming, which is why I started a blog instead of sending in another article to SWRC. This is not material that everyone will want to read.
I am getting over a stress fracture, as all of you that will take the time to read this already know. I spent three months dreaming about my first run back! I was so ready. I do not mean the run/walks I had to do to get ready for my first run, I mean my first 30 minutes of pure running joy. It was not joy. It did not make me feel whole again. It was definitely not the wonderful event I expected after 3 months of not running. Let me explain....
I am not sure what I was expected. I have made many stupid choices in my life but overall I tend to think of myself as a pretty intelligent person. So why I thought the pain would magically disappear and I would have a wonderful, tears of joy at the end of it run, is beyond me. It hurt. Bad. Enough to make me question whether I should be back to running at all. I saw my trusty doctor and he gave me the go ahead. He told me there would be pain, set backs, and I would always be prone to hip stress fractures. I wanted to punch him. You mean I followed every suggestion, spent all my race money on therapy, MRI and x-rays, and sat out for 3 months to still feel the same pain I was feeling before. So am I healed or not? Well we won't exactly know because an MRI will still show it is broke..... I stopped listening somewhere at this point. I was happy to be able to continue to run and believe me, I realize I am more fortunate than others, but it still stings...
That was a few weeks ago. I am up to running 37 minutes tonight. I have found that running on the DREADmill hurts less than running outside. Actually last week during one of my 33 minute runs I had no pain. YEAH! But my excitement is basically gone. This is the point I finally get sad. Believe me when I say this, I was even impressed how well I took everything the last 3 months! Before the stress fracture the idea of not running was as bad as death (seriously you can ask my boyfriend, mom, friends). So when I showed up at races to volunteer and cheer my friends on and had a REAL smile, yes I was actually ok with it, I was shocked! Now it is harder to put on that real smile. I can't do speed work, I can't race fast, I can't really participate in the Illinois marathon training because I can't run that far. When I run it is usually on the treadmill, on my own, boring and sad.
So my main point of this is, how do I forgive running. I mean, I look forward more to my swim and bike workouts, even core workouts (COME ON!) than I do running. When will I be able to stop looking for the pain every single time I run? Is it there or just in my head. Will I always be nervous before I run instead of being excited like I use to be. I am terrified I lost the love for it because it hurt me. You know, like running cheated on me and I am having a hard time forgiving it and letting it back in. I am only human. I guess I have to remind myself that it was once one of the most important things in my life and it will come back in time.
I know deep down I am a life long runner. It will come back and I will love it once again. It was too important to me to just throw it out after my first real obstacle with it. But until I get that feeling I once had for it, I will try to remember the good times I had with it! I mean the friends I made while running have been right by my side through this whole obstacle, that alone says enough to bring me back!
niki.lake@facebook.com
I am getting over a stress fracture, as all of you that will take the time to read this already know. I spent three months dreaming about my first run back! I was so ready. I do not mean the run/walks I had to do to get ready for my first run, I mean my first 30 minutes of pure running joy. It was not joy. It did not make me feel whole again. It was definitely not the wonderful event I expected after 3 months of not running. Let me explain....
I am not sure what I was expected. I have made many stupid choices in my life but overall I tend to think of myself as a pretty intelligent person. So why I thought the pain would magically disappear and I would have a wonderful, tears of joy at the end of it run, is beyond me. It hurt. Bad. Enough to make me question whether I should be back to running at all. I saw my trusty doctor and he gave me the go ahead. He told me there would be pain, set backs, and I would always be prone to hip stress fractures. I wanted to punch him. You mean I followed every suggestion, spent all my race money on therapy, MRI and x-rays, and sat out for 3 months to still feel the same pain I was feeling before. So am I healed or not? Well we won't exactly know because an MRI will still show it is broke..... I stopped listening somewhere at this point. I was happy to be able to continue to run and believe me, I realize I am more fortunate than others, but it still stings...
That was a few weeks ago. I am up to running 37 minutes tonight. I have found that running on the DREADmill hurts less than running outside. Actually last week during one of my 33 minute runs I had no pain. YEAH! But my excitement is basically gone. This is the point I finally get sad. Believe me when I say this, I was even impressed how well I took everything the last 3 months! Before the stress fracture the idea of not running was as bad as death (seriously you can ask my boyfriend, mom, friends). So when I showed up at races to volunteer and cheer my friends on and had a REAL smile, yes I was actually ok with it, I was shocked! Now it is harder to put on that real smile. I can't do speed work, I can't race fast, I can't really participate in the Illinois marathon training because I can't run that far. When I run it is usually on the treadmill, on my own, boring and sad.
So my main point of this is, how do I forgive running. I mean, I look forward more to my swim and bike workouts, even core workouts (COME ON!) than I do running. When will I be able to stop looking for the pain every single time I run? Is it there or just in my head. Will I always be nervous before I run instead of being excited like I use to be. I am terrified I lost the love for it because it hurt me. You know, like running cheated on me and I am having a hard time forgiving it and letting it back in. I am only human. I guess I have to remind myself that it was once one of the most important things in my life and it will come back in time.
I know deep down I am a life long runner. It will come back and I will love it once again. It was too important to me to just throw it out after my first real obstacle with it. But until I get that feeling I once had for it, I will try to remember the good times I had with it! I mean the friends I made while running have been right by my side through this whole obstacle, that alone says enough to bring me back!
niki.lake@facebook.com
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