We have all been told, the grass isn't always greener on the other side, someone has it worse off than you. In running you are always reminded that someone is always slower, faster, stronger, etc. I have been thinking a lot about running lately. Usually when I am thinking about it I am also feeling sorry for myself because I am still dealing with my injury. The injury that everyone has to be sick of hearing about because I am sick of typing it. I am sure if that app popped up trying to find the words most associated with my Facebook page, injury, running, bacon, and serial killers would pop up. What is wrong with me... I scare myself.
So up until 2 weeks ago I was coming along fine with my marathon training. Everything felt good. I was training smart, not running too much. Do you ever have that moment where you know you did something you are going to regret? I don't mean eating another piece of cake, or having too many beers and wondering if you should have kissed you know who, I mean that moment when the run felt so damn good but you know you are going to regret it later? I had that.
So I had to run 16 by myself. Miles, yes 16 miles for my non running friends. I know I have like 5 of them :) It was 5pm when I started, I was hungry, cold, and wanted it done. I started the first 6 miles out a little fast but they felt ok. My longer runs are supposed to be at 9:00 pace but I run with Michele and well, we always go faster. (Always the competitive ones aren't we!) Anyway I was hitting about 8:40 pace. After the first 10 I took a honey stinger waffle break and headed back out just wanted to get the 6 done. Well, I did, in record pace.... I would later tell people that the following week when doing my 18 mile run I looked at my watch at 15 miles and was only 2 minutes slower than what I had ran the 16 miles the week before. Yeah. I ran too fast. Most of the time this is a great thing, but when you are training for a marathon, you need to train right. My body basically thought it ran a marathon. I did not give it time to recover after that, and the pain started...
My hamstring started warning me, it was tight for a few days. I kept running hoping it would go away but it only got worse and hurt enough I couldn't walk correctly let alone run. I was smart at this point, iced and took sometime off only to find out that my hip was hurting again. Not sure if there was/is a correlation, since all my pain is on my right side, but it is a definite warning. When the hip speaks I listen. I mean, it has obviously had a mind of its own for 1.5 years now and it demands to be heard. F@*K!!
Anyway. I had a few days of feeling sorry for myself. A few tears, a few eye rolls from Cory, a few worries from my mom, and a few "not this again" for my friends. I was pissed, not gonna lie. In 2014, I listened to my friends successes, their PRs, and I was a good sport. Damnit it is my time to shine. It is someone else's turn to have an injury (just none of my friends please). About this time I saw a Facebook post from a friend that said something special was gonna take place at the armory last Wednesday night. Another friend said he was going to the armory to watch a certain girl we all love run. What? Come again?? Did you say Murelle is running? When did I miss this? Oh yeah I was wallowing in my own self pity, that's when I missed it. Well, since I couldn't run there is no one in the world I would rather see run again than Murelle. You got that right, I would pick her to see run over myself, over Meb, over anyone.
And she ran. And it was the most heart warming, inspirational experience I have had in a long time. It changed my attitude completely. For a girl who is only 15, she has been through more than most of us will go through in a lifetime, and come out on the other side running with a smile.
I was driving home after that, my heart full, my mind at ease for the first time in days, and I realized, it could be a lot worse. I can still run, maybe not as far as I want, but hey, to be honest, I did not really like the long runs anyway. Funny. I was so upset that I would not be able to do the marathon but when I actually stopped and thought about it, I did not even care. I enjoy speed work, and tempo runs. I enjoy swim training with Mike (even when I swallow a ton of water), and I enjoy long grueling trainer sessions while watching Blacklist or some serial killer show. I even enjoy strength and core. But when I wake up and have a long run it just annoys me to death. I had a goal and when my goal was disturbed I got mad. That was why I was feeling sorry for myself. Isn't that ridiculous?
So I want to thank Murelle again. Thank you for being the person you are. The inspiration in all our lives. When someone asks me who my hero is, I do not say Meb, Kara, Paula, or one of the other top runners, I say Murelle. She has taught me more than any of those people have ever taught me. Mainly, that my life is great. Obstacles come and go, some are harder than others. Each of us have battles, but it is how we come out of the battle that defines us. Do I want to come out complaining and feeling sorry for myself, or do I want to come out running, with a smile, and a 100 people shouting my name with tears in their eyes because I have brought hope to their hearts. Yeah, I think I will choose Murelle's way....
The grass is greener on my side, sometimes I just need to dig through a foot of snow to remember...
